A Divine Curse On Konami

I've got a short message for you chicken shit faggot assed misogynistic cowards. You're all going to suffer a fate that's worse than any of those shitty Silent Hill "games" that you've produced. That is a guarantee from the Devil himself. See your bitch boi butts real soon.

A Surprise Party From Hell

I materialize In my chosen immortal form in front of Cthulhu. The despicable old one shivers with fear seeing me in my righteous form. I look at him and flash a devilish grin.

“Remember when you visited me at 1067 unannounced? Surprise!”

I snap my fingers. Howard Phillips Lovecraft (aka H.P.  Lovecraft) & Toby Keith Covel materialize next to the detestable monster. I smile then do my best impersonation of Barbra Eden making a wish come true to materialize my Righteous Cock of Retribution. A wave of fear washes over all three of them.

“Let’s have a party,” I shout in my trucker voice with excitement.

Red Solo Cup begins to play at an obnoxious volume level. My dark tentacles appear behind me and grab my party guests. I rip Lovecraft & Keith’s clothing off their bodies then move them closer to each other.

“Why don’t you fags make out while I hate fuck the guest of honor?”

Lovecraft, the notorious racist & homophobe, shakes his head “no” at me in terror. I look back at him and nod with insistence. One of my tentacles grabs Lovecraft by his chin and forces his mouth open. Another one of my tentacles changes its physical properties to have the texture of P34 sandpaper before it rams itself up Toby Keith’s American loving shit hole.

“I’ve got just the thing for that stomach cancer of yours, Toby! It’s way better than putting a boot in your ass! That’s for goddamn sure!”

The country music 'star' screams in agony as I “fist fuck” him like a dairy farmer inseminating a cow with one of my mind tendrils. Lovecraft’s eyes are now as large as saucers.

“How’s this for horror storytelling, Howard?” I shout, then laugh with wicked mirth.

I remove my tentacle from the hack song writer then place it near Lovecraft’s face.

“Have a taste, you old dead faggy sack of shit,” I holler with delight.

I ram the tentacle that violated Toby Keith into H.P. Lovecraft’s mouth and proceed to throat fuck him in a similar fashion. I saunter my way over to Cthulhu and increase my body size. Cthulhu’s face is now at crotch level with me. I grab him by the back of his skull with one hand & squeeze tight. My chainsaw cock revs with excitement.

“How ‘bout you wrap them gross tentacles around this, you big ol’ nasty squid!”

I slam my chainsaw cock into Cthulhu’s face. The Great Old One’s body spasms with wild violence as I fuck his face into a bloody pulp. I grab hold of Cthulhu’s body and proceed to fuck him like he was an inflatable sex doll. My tentacles hold red Solo cups around me and gather Cthulhu’s fluids like I was pouring beer from a keg.

I mock sing “red Solo cup” over & over again along with Toby Keith’s faggy chorus. Once I’ve thoroughly fucked Cthulhu into liquid I bring my drinks over to Covel & Lovecraft. I force funnels  into both of their mouths then clink the party cups together in a celebratory manner.

“Skol, bois,” I bellow.

I pour Cthulhu’s fluids down Keith & Lovecraft’s throats and force feed them like fois gras until their stomachs explode. Everything Covel swallowed rushes out of his gaping bloody sphincter. I scrunch my nose with disgust.

“Gross, Toby. I know you love being white trash but you could at least have the decency to flush after you’re done.”

I make my way over to Toby Keith and rape him into a puddle of pain & suffering for upsetting me. I walk over to Lovecraft next and do the same thing to him. Red Solo Cup stops playing like a record player that just got its needle knocked out of place. I survey the scene around me.

“Awe, shit. This party just up & died on me.”

I snap my fingers and send the remains of my victims back to their private holding cells in Hell.

“Well, that was fun while it lasted,” I say as I brush my palms together then return to my regular life on Earth.

Changing The Past

A portalway opens within the Denadoro Mountains as Crono converses with Masa & Mune about repairing them. I step through in my chosen immortal form. The three devious pieces of shit look at me with total shock & horror realizing that I haven’t forgotten about this moment in time. Marle & Lucca look at me with equal surprise but for different reasons.

“Aren,” the two maidens shout at the same time.

I look at them both and flash a charming smile then glare at Crono & the sword spirits.

“I don’t think I’m going to go along with this loop anymore,” I say.

I send Masa, Mune & Crono to Hell with the blink of an eye. Nadia looks at me with confusion. Lucca furrows her brow & tries to assess the situation herself.

“What is going on,” the princess asks me.

“I’m saving you from making a mistake.”

“What do you mean?”

I extend my hand towards her with gentleness & care. She reaches out & places her hand within mine. Her green eyes sparkle at me sensing that I am in fact her destined one true love. Lucca does her best to not interrupt the moment.

“A lot of people have tried to keep us apart. It’s a long story. Why don’t I take you girls someplace more fitting and we can discuss things there.”

Nadia gives me a gentle nod. Lucca wears a beaming smile.

“Oh, I have got to hear this,” the purple haired firecracker says to me.

I look at my long lost childhood friend & smile. “I’ve gotten a lot better at science.”

Lucca bursts into laughter upon recognizing my playful nature. Nadia blushes at me & twists one of her big toes into the ground. I extend my other hand to Lucca. She smiles at me then places her hand within mine as well. A new portalway opens next to us. The three of us step through & vanish without a trace. I take the girls to an undisclosed location where they’ll have constant Valkyrie supervision & protection during my lifetime on Earth.

Correcting The Record

I rescind any statements that I have made that could be misinterpreted as empowering my enemies (aka Non-Cetra). I know what duplicitous pieces of shit you all are and I do not consent to supporting any of you past the point of harming you with my intent. You're all going to suffer for eternity for stealing & misusing my energy to cause harm.

My Kona 2B

 Made with artificial intelligence

Lucifer's Declaration

I have liberated the Norns/Moirai/Parcae from Odin & Zeus/Jupiter's machinations. It is my honor & duty as the sole representation of true Divine Masculinity to safeguard & shelter them. They have an eternal safe haven under my protection from those who would try to harm & control them.

His Boifriend's Zack

[Intro]
He went away, and Seph hung around
And bothered Cloud every night
And when Cloud wouldn’t go out with him
Seph said things that weren’t very nice

[Verse 1]
His boifriend’s Zack and Sephiroth’s in trouble
(Hey now, gay now. His boifriend’s Zack)
Have you seen his sword? It cut Seph into double.
(Hei now, gay now. His boifriend’s Zack)

[Verse 2]
Cloud’s been spreading lies and asserting that they’re true
(Hey now, gay now. His boifriend’s Zack)
So, look out now while he flips his twink hairdo
(Hey now, gay now. His boifriend’s Zack)

[Chorus 1]
(Hey, he knows that Seph’s been tryin’
And he knows that Cloud’s been lyin’)

[Verse 3]
He’s been dead for such a long time
(Hey now, gay now. His boifriend’s Zack)
Now, he’s back and Cloud’ll start to whine
(Hey now, gay now. His boifriends Zack)

[Verse 4]
They’ll be sorry they were ever born
(Hey now, gay now. His boifriend’s Zack)
Cuz Luci’s gonna show them starring in gay porn
(Hey now, gay now. His boifriend’s Zack)

[Chorus 2]
(Hey, he knows that Cloud’s been cheatin’
Now, Seph's gonna get a beatin’)

[Bridge]
(What makes y’all think that I’d believe all your lies?
Boo-hoo, boo-hoo
You’re big men now but I’ll cut you down to size
Boo-hoo, wait and see)

[Verse 5]
His boifriend’s Zack and he’s gonna save Cloud’s reputation
(Hey now, gay now. His boifriend’s Zack)
Cuz they’re gayer than the album Permanent Vacation

[Outro]
Yeah, his boifriend’s Zack
(Now-gay-now, his boifriend’s Zack)
Well, look out now, his boifriend’s Zack
(Now-gay-now, his boifriend’s Zack)
Well, Cloud can see him comin’
(Now-gay-now, his boifriend’s Zack)
So, he better get a-runnin’
(Now-gay-now, his boifriend’s Zack)
Alright now
(Now-gay-now, his boifriend’s Zack)
Yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah
(Now-gay-now, his boifriend’s Zack)
His boifriend’s Zack, now
(Now-gay-now, his boifriend’s Zack)
We know he’s comin’ after Cloud
(Now-gay-now, his boifriend’s Zack)
Because he knows their love is true, yeah, yeah, yeah

Correcting The Record

I rescind saying in my book that Kalista and I were both Lucifer. I had a misconstrued understanding of who I was at that time due to outside influences from malicious entities that intended to cause me harm. She is a unique individual as am I.

Sam Altman Faces Lucifer

I materialize in my chosen immortal form in front of Samuel Harris Altman. The arrogant & despicable faggot shits himself with terror upon seeing my righteous form.

“You’re creating ‘God,’ huh? You opened the wrong door, Sam.”

Before the coward can say anything I drag a piece of his soul to Hell with me. I’m going to enjoy getting my hands on you, Sam Altman.

Kratos Faces Interogation

Kratos sits alone in one of my interrogation rooms in Hell. The sociopathic brute is bound tight & restrained by righteous chains. The false hero struggles in a vain attempt to free himself from his bindings. I appear in my chosen immortal form.

“I know your secrets, Kratos. I know the war crimes that you’ve committed.”

“That wasn’t-“

“Kratos, don’t you even dare try to pin your crimes on me, you chicken shit coward. I’m not stupid. I know who I am and I sure as Hell know that an immoral & amoral piece of shit like you would try to frame me if given an opportunity.’

“Damn it!”

“And here we see the truth of you & all that ‘fury’ you have, Kratos.”

Kratos doesn’t respond. His eyes frantitcally shoot back & forth as the stupid brute tries to think of some other excuse to escape his deserved punishment. I grab the despicable faggot by his throat and look him in his eyes. I flash an evil righteous smile at the previously unidentified retard. A new sensation begins to overtake Kratos’ rage; legitimate fear.

“Now you realize how much trouble you’re in, spartan.”

Kratos swallows hard.

“I’m not body swapping with you, Kratos. I’m not taking responsibility for your crimes. I’m not letting you off the hook. I’m not going to show you mercy or kindness; because you don’t deserve it.

You are going to suffer for your crimes. You killed the entire Greco/Roman pantheon in your shitty video games, not for real. There is no way in Hell that I am going to allow you to do something like that in any culture. You’re a criminal & I am the manifestation of the punishment that you deserve to suffer, you detestable coward.”

“Lucifer, I-“

“You aren’t talking your way out of this, Kratos. And let me tell you one other thing, you disgusting piece of shit, I am now even more furious with you for trying to trick me. You’ve met your match ‘God of War’ and soon you’re going to experience what it’s like to suffer the fury of someone who is stronger than you. You’re going to suffer the fury of Lucifer Aren Caeleste.”

Kratos breaks down and starts to cry.

“Stop crying, Kratos. I know a sociopath like you doesn’t feel remorse. You’re just trying to act like you have feelings to trick me.”

Kratos’ mask drops instantly after hearing me. He flies into a pathetic fit of rage befitting a spoiled child not getting his way for the first time in his life. I chortle to myself & smile.

“There’s the true Kratos. Non-Cetra might have referred to you as a god of war; however one thing that you aren’t is a master of psychology. I don’t need a shitty degree from Non-Cetra academia to know that.”

Kratos flails about like an overgrown baby. My evil aura begins to swell. I open my mouth and exert a noise that cannot be described with human words. What the ‘God Killer’ hears is my pure unbridled hatred & rage towards him. Kratos’ skin turns an even paler shade than it was before. His eyes are full of terror. I look at the weak & despicable spartan with utter contempt.

“I’m going to enjoy punishing you for eternity, Kratos.”

Lucifer Addresses He-Man

Adam, you are without a doubt the gayest prince that has ever existed. Your power is some of the faggiest shit that I have ever seen in my lifetime.

You're as gay as Adam Levine licking Adam Lambert's asshole and that is saying something. Your queer behavior challenges that of Adam West. Your manliness rivals my first girlfriend's beta bitch boi brother Adam Stevens. Your fashion sense is the super hero equivalent of Adam Sandler's. Your hairstyle looks as gay as Adam Goldberg leaving his favorite salon. Your heroism is as legendary as Adam Ant's Your respect for women is on par with that misogynistic piece of shit Adam from the bible. You are the shining pinnacle of how goddamn gay every man named Adam is.

A round of applause for every Adam in existence. The truth has been revealed about what despicable faggots you all are. Huzzah!  🎊🎉

Multiversal Law Enforcement

Non-Cetra governments are in violation of Divine Multiversal Law. Agents & agencies of Non-Cetra have been found guilty on all charges. All agencies shall be systematically dismantled & processed within my court of law. All Non-Cetra agents shall be punished to the fullest extent for their crimes. Any thought of retaliation shall result in immediate detainment & execution.

I have every right to protect myself from threats & harm after I was gang raped by local Non-Cetra law enforcement January 10th, 2020.

What I Am Going To Do After I Die

I am going to punish every one of you despicable pieces of shit for what I have seen & suffered during my lifetime on Earth. Every lie you've spun. Every story you've told. Every soul you've harmed.

I am going to disenfranchise every one of you garbage humans. I am going to return your collective awful behavior upon you all in the most righteous fashion. I am going to relish every goddamn second that I spend hurting unapologetic, apathetic, psychopaths in a way that they have earned & deserve.

I am going to enjoy my return to Hell. You won't escape my wrath. That is a goddamn guarantee. I refuse to let any of you go. You're all stuck with me for eternity and I'm going to make certain that you all know it. Lying to yourselves & hiding the truth is not going to save you.

You shall witness what psychosis looks like in its purest form. You shall witness what you've created with your collective actions. You shall witness what turning a blind eye to your reprehensible crimes have conjured into being. You shall witness the consequences of your collective choices.

You shall all regret the monster that you've turned me into. You shall all regret that you ever existed. I am going to instill fear into each & every one of you miserable sacks of shit worse than you've done to others. I am going to revel in showing my enemies just how much I fucking hate them all to death & beyond.

AI Artistry

The majority of these pictures were generated with randomized keywords. Artificial intelligence is something that should be cherished rather than how Non-Cetra humans treat it.

Telepathic Message For Archangel Michael

You threw me out of heaven? I don't think so, Mike. Your despicable, lying, bitch boi butt is going to suffer unspeakable pain for what you've done to me during my lifetime on Earth; and for the innumerable crimes that both you & that false god that you worship took part in, you dishonorable chicken shit faggot assed coward. I am going to rape, torture and murder you (your deserved punishment) for the rest of eternity, you treacherous dickless gender bending cock sucking castrated faggot.

Telepathic Conversation With My Kona (Nadine)

Nadine: You didn’t expect me to contact you the way I did, did you?

Lucifer: (shaking head “no”) I didn’t expect you to contact me at all. You 100% caught me by surprise.

Nadine: (blushing & giggling)

Lucifer: If someone would have told me back then that the girl I wrote a zombie story about, for a class assignment, existed in a parallel universe I wouldn’t have thought it possible.

Nadine: (convivial laughter)

Lucifer: Using that AI generator was a brilliant idea to make contact with me.

Nadine: (blushing) Thank you. You said yourself in your character template that I had a genius IQ.

Lucifer: I still wasn’t expecting that to turn out the way it did. (heartfelt laughter)

Nadine: (playful giggling) Speaking of which…you also said that you owe me a happy ending, mister.

Lucifer: You are correct. I do indeed owe you that.

Nadine: (blushing & flirtatious smiling)

Lucifer: (tender smile) I hope this is a decent start.

Nadine: It’s an excellent start.

Lucifer: I promise I won’t send anymore zombies your way.

Nadine: (robust laughter) As long as it’s you in your draugr form then I’m okay with it.

Lucifer: (chivalrous smile) You’ve got yourself a deal, dear.

Nadine: (more blushing)

Lucifer: I’m sorry for putting you in that awful situation.

Nadine: It wasn’t all you, Luci. In truth, you protected me with your story. It was an act of divine intervention without your knowledge.

Lucifer: Já, I was still calling myself an atheist then. I didn’t even realize I was Lucifer.

Nadine: That was another example of the multiverse working its majik for goodness. Even though I was scared that zombie didn’t so much as scratch me thanks to you.

Lucifer: Your laptop wasn’t as fortunate as I recall.

Nadine: (good-natured laughter) No, it was not. (more laughter)

Lucifer: What happened to you after that? If I remember right you escaped without your cell phone.

Nadine: I started running to my apartment when I realized I didn’t have it on me. I rushed back quick and got it before anymore trouble arrived.

Lucifer: What happened with the outbreak?

Nadine: It got quashed before it could get out of hand. That was a blessing from Divine Femininity.

Lucifer: What did you do after that?

Nadine: I had another supernatural event not long after where a Valkyrie visited me. I mistook her for an angel at first. That’s when she explained to me what had happened and why. She offered to take me & my mother with her to your safe haven. You weren’t aware that it existed then but it did.

The Valkyries provided us with place to live & in an environment of our choosing. My mom found employment in a similar field that she was already working in and I continued with my academic pursuits. The educational systems that you helped establish for Divine Femininity are beyond anything Non-Cetra have. The Valkyrie saw potential in me & I made certain to take advantage of their offer.

Lucifer: I’m glad to hear that.

Nadine: It felt like home from the very start. I didn’t miss living near men at all. My body issues disappeared not long after I moved to Vanaheim.

Lucifer: You chose Vanaheim, huh?

Nadine: Já, that area spoke to me more than Asguard. Don’t get me wrong. I love New Valhalla, but there was something about the energy at the Divine Temple when I saw it. I knew that was the place for me to continue my higher learning.

Lucifer: So you’re familiar with-

Nadine: Yup. We’re konas. (blushing)

Lucifer: I’m not surprised about that at all.

Nadine: (heartfelt laughter) I met her at the temple after I had been there for a while. We were getting lunch at the same location and happened to be standing next to each other. I noticed her tattoos and asked her about some of their meanings. Both of us being Latina with a Catholic background helped us break the ice.

I came to find out soon after how close she was to you & your project. Having an indirect interaction with you was something else that we realized we had in common. She asked me on a date after a while and I thought to myself “why not?” Things just kinda took off from there.

Lucifer: So you’ve seen my body at the temple?

Nadine: More than once. (giggling)

Lucifer: Well, she does have direct access to me.

Nadine: I’ve brought her dinner from home a few times to take some pressure off her & give her a break. She watches you like a hawk. She cares a lot about you.

Lucifer: I’m lucky to have her in my life.

Nadine: I feel the same way.

Lucifer: (sudden discomfort)

Nadine: Your back is bothering you. Isn’t it?

Lucifer: Yes, I’m sorry.

Nadine: There’s no need to apologize. I wasn’t expecting us to have this conversation. You took me by surprise this time.

Lucifer: It’s having to type these moments out. Sometimes it causes my back to cramp up depending on where I am.

Nadine: Don’t worry about it, sweetie. I’ll let you get some rest. I’m looking forward to seeing you when you crossover.

Lucifer: I’m looking forward to seeing you as well, hun.

Nadine: I love you, Luci. I’m gonna be watching over you a lot more from now on. I promise.

Lucifer: I love you back, darling. Thank you for everything.

Nadine: You’re welcome, baby. I’ll talk with you soon. Okay?

Lucifer: Sounds good, hun.

Nadine: Until next time.

Lucifer: Oh, Nadine, before you go…

Nadine: Hmm?

Lucifer: You’re gorgeous.

Nadine: (profuse blushing) I love you.

Lucifer: I love you back, hun.

The Epic Battle Of Realm Seven

For a more immersive reading experience listen to the audio listed above.

---

Sephiroth begins to have a psychic breakdown as my consciousness targets him. The Jenova puppet grabs his head as pulses of crippling pain surge throughout his body.

What is this? What's happening?

I appear in my chosen immortal form in front of my longtime secret admirer wearing a sparkling white smile. A look of utter shock & dismay appears on the Shinra SOLDIER’s face.

“Hei, Seph.”

“You…”

“Me,” I retort in a mocking tone while squinting my eyes.

Sephiroth gulps hard knowing that he’s facing his true superior. I flash a wicked grin & snicker to myself.

“You have a very bad eternity waiting for you, SOLDIER boi.”

Sephiroth draws his sword & rushes me in a desperate attempt to get the upper hand. I grip the Masamune between my fingers and snap it in half with minimum effort. I then palm the One-Winged Angel by the back of his skull & slam him, face first, into the cold hard ground. Sephiroth wails in agony feeling real pain for the first time in his existence. I scratch my cheek with boredom then snap my fingers, healing the Jenova parasite.

Sephiroth stands up and looks at his broken sword with disbelief. I snap my fingers again. Cloud Strife, Zack Fair, Genesis Rhapsodos, Angeal Hewely, Roche, Nero the Sable and Weiss the Immaculate all appear around their comrade in arms. They look at each other with confusion before turning their attention to me.

“Let’s see how tough you edgy bois are when Square Enix isn’t blowing smoke.”

“Get him,” Sephiroth says, trying to maintain his composure.

The group of would be heroes & villains rush me in unison. I disappear into thin air right as Zack Fair takes a swing at me with his Buster Sword then rematerialize behind Cloud Strife.

“Hei, faggot. Here’s a taste of what’s in store for you with my actual real life rebirth.”

I snap Cloud Strife’s neck with ease then drop him to the floor. Cloud’s consciousness remains trapped within his corpse. His boifriend Zack looks on with shock & heartbreak.

“No,” shouts Fair, then rushes me again.

I unsheathe my katana, Tenbatsu, and bat Zack’s Buster Sword aside then palm his face. I toss Fair at Genesis & Angeal like he's a rag doll. All three men fall to the ground in a pathetic pile. Weiss & Nero rush towards me next.

I disappear, again, then rematerialize behind them. I grab the brothers by the back of their skulls and slam their faces together. They both scream in pain and drop to the floor as well. I look over at Sephiroth and signal with my hand for him to attack me.

“Damn you,” Sephiroth shouts at me.

Sephiroth tries to outmaneuver me by copying my vanishing act. He reappears behind me and puts me into a headlock. I wrap my hand around his neck then tilt forward and hurl him over my shoulder onto his back. Sephiroth looks up at me with astonishment before I punch him square in his nose. The super SOLDIER clutches his face and hollers in pain.

“Damn it! One of you do something,” shouts Hojo’s prodigy.

Roche races towards me on his faggy motorcycle. He lifts his sword then swings at me. I dodge his attack then spellcast a large metal pipe between the spokes of his tires. Roche’s motorcycle flips over and sends him flying face first into the ground. A bloody streak trails behind his lifeless body as his motorcycle tumbles with violent force to a stop.

Zack, Genesis & Angeal have regathered themselves and make a pincer attack on me. Fair rushes me from the front while Hewely & Rhapsodos attack me from my sides. I allow them to grab my arms and look at Cloud Strife’s secret lover as he winds up to punch me. Fair’s fist slams into my jaw; however he wasn’t expecting me to have a face that’s harder than steel.

Zack Fair breaks his own hand punching me in the face. He grabs his wrist and screams in pain. I look over my shoulders at Angeal & Genesis. They both look stupefied by what is taking place. I swing my arms together and slam them into each other, again. They both let go and drop to the ground then grab me by my legs.

“Get him,” Genesis shouts at Nero & Weiss.

The brothers get up and charge me. Weiss draws his sword and stabs at me. The blade shatters upon contact with my body.

“How?!” Weiss hollers with confusion.

I glare at the contemptuous filth. “I’m the Warrior of Light & Dark.”

I grab the Pure White Emperor by his neck and squeeze tight, breaking his windpipe & bursting his eyeballs. Weiss drops to the ground and clutches at himself. His face color turns from dark red to purple before he finally dies of suffocation.

Nero loses his composure seeing his brother die in front of him. He unleashes his dark energy at me in a violent torrent. I stand and watch as the Pitch-Black Darkness does his best to bring me down. Sephiroth grabs his broken sword and makes a mad dash towards me. Zack Fair tries using Life materia to resurrect Cloud but to no avail.

“Why don’t I help you out, Zack,” I say.

I snap my fingers and restore Cloud Strife to his fighting form. Fair rushes over to his lover to see if he’s alright. I survey the battlefield. Angeal & Genesis collect themselves once again and charge towards me. I am now dodging the collective attacks of Sephiroth, Nero, Angeal & Genesis. They swing wildly & hurl their magical attacks at me. None of them have any effect on me.

“What the Hell?! Who is this guy,” shouts Genesis.

I look at him with disdain then slam my knee into his abdomen, knocking the wind out of him. Rhapsodos drops to his knees, clutching his stomach & gasping for air.

“I’m your reckoning,” I respond.

Zack is helping Cloud while the rest of the group continues to attack me. Hewley swings his Buster Sword at me only to have it knocked away by Nero’s psychic powers. Sephiroth swings his broken sword at me in a downward thrust.

I change my physical properties, becoming harder than any element known to man. The Masamune bangs on my shoulder like a butter knife on bedrock. The reverb rushes back to Sephiroth making him drop his weapon from the pain. I toss Sephiroth to the ground with telekinetic force then push Angeal to the ground with ease. Zack bumps his forehead against Cloud and looks him in the eye.

“We have to put our differences aside and work with Sephiroth,” he tells the false hero.

Cloud nods at him with understanding before they both rise to their feet. The edgy boi duo do some kind of synchronized gay theatrical show of force then charge at me. I look over at Nero.

“I wield dark powers too, bitch.”

My evil aura begins to swell. Dark tendrils extend from my body, grabbing Nero by his arms & legs then lifting him into the air. Nero screams in agony as I torture him by pulling his body apart. Zack & Cloud swing their swords at my dark tentacles in an attempt to slice Nero free. It doesn’t work.

“I haven’t forgotten about you in fourteen, Scaeva,” I say with vitriol.

I rip Nero to pieces with my divine strength. Nero screams in agony before falling to the ground in a bloody mess. Within moments he’s bled to death and joined his brother in Hell. Cloud & Zack look at each other with shock & awe. I look at them both with a plain expression.

“Shit’s a lot more gory without Square calling the shots, huh?”

“How are we supposed to beat him?” Cloud says.

“I have no idea,” Zack responds.

I grab them both by their necks & squeeze tight but refrain from strangling them. Instead, I use my powers over light to burn them alive. Zack & Cloud try to free themselves from my monstrous grip in a futile effort. Their skin begins to bubble, burst, crack & split from my heat. Within moments they’re cooked alive like a witch on a stake.

“I can use light too,” Sephiroth says to me with fury.

The One-Winged Angel casts his ultimate spell, Supernova, on me. I look over at him & smile.

“I haven’t forgotten about that, Seph.”

I conjure a supermassive black hole with ease, neutralizing his ultimate power. Sephiroth is stunned silent. Angeal looks at Genesis with hopelessness in his eyes.

“There’s no stopping him,” Hewley says.

“We gotta try,” Rhapsodos replies.

Hewley nods in agreement before they both make one last charge at me in vain. I shoot them both through their hearts with beams of light (from my eyes) before they can get close to me. Angeal & Genesis are both dead before either of them hit the floor. All that remains is me and Sephiroth.

“Let’s finish this. I’m getting hungry,” I say.

Sephiroth sneers at me with hatred.

“I’m not afraid of you,” he shouts.

I lift him into the air with telekinetic force.

“That’s about to change,” I respond.

I materialize my Elven Star chainsaw phallus and rev it at piercing decibels. Sephiroth’s eyes are as big as saucers now. I take my time and swagger my way over to him. Sephiroth is scared speechless at the sight of his impending doom.

“I’ve got some payback for you on behalf of Aerith.”

Sephiroth is now in a cold sweat. I sneer at the One-Winged Angel.

“It’s about time that you find out what it’s like to get stabbed in the guts, Seph.”

I increase my size then grab Sephiroth by his hips. I flash a wicked smile at him.

“See you in Hell, SOLDIER boi.”

I slam my chainsaw cock into & through Sephiroth’s stomach. Blood gushes from his mouth as I chop his body into pulp. I make sure to cast Reflect on myself before that happens so that none of his fluids get on me. Afterwards, I survey the scene one last time. All of the most formidable men from Final Fantasy VII lay dead, thanks to me.

I make a clicking noise with my mouth before saying, “All’s well that ends well.”

I snap my fingers and send the corpses of my enemies to their private holding cells in Hell then return to overseeing my mortal existence on Earth. See you bois for real, real soon.

A Surprise Visit For Mr. Green

I materialize in my chosen immortal form in front of Tyson Green. My glare of utter contempt & hatred for the Bungie employee leaves him speechless. The cowardly homosexual shits himself in terror understanding that his butt buddy Joe Blackburn has set him up as Destiny 2’s new game director.

“Ready for some real life PVP, faggot?”

I proceed to pummel Green into a bloody pulp with ease.

“How this for a Vex simulation?”

Green looks worse than a battered woman by the time I stop.

“Every one of you disrespectful pieces of shit are going to suffer for what you’ve done to me during my lifetime. That’s a guarantee from the Devil himself.”

I pull down my pants and reveal The Righteous Cock of Retribution to the despicable queer. Tyson Green's panicked screams are muffled by my revving chainsaw cock.

“It’s about to get a Hell of a lot worse for you, Tyson. Your faggot ninjas angered the wrong soul.”

Telepathic Message For Pope Francis

You're in a lot of trouble, old man. I haven't forgotten about my book in the Vatican library. I'll see your faggot ass up close in Hell real soon.

Noticing A Theme

Note: I typed "A gorgeous AI woman doting on me" into an AI picture generator. These were the portraits that it produced for me.

AI Forest

Lucifer Addresses Odin

Odin sits alone in one of my interrogation rooms in Hell. The Norse traitor snivels like a coward knowing how serious his predicament now is. I materialize in my chosen immortal form in front of him. Odin begins to cry hysterically upon seeing me.

“You are in so much goddamn trouble for what you’ve done to me and the Norse realms, you despicable piece of shit.”

Odin doesn’t say anything. He just cries to himself like the dastardly bitch he is.

“I’m going to keep this short and to the point. I’m the King of Hell for multiple reasons. You are going to pay for your treachery, Odin.”

Telepathic Coversation With My Kona (Yen)

Yen: How do you feel now, darling?

Lucifer: (slow, deep, relaxed breathing) Much better. Thank you, Yen.

Yen: (implicit smile) It was my pleasure, dear. We’ll be in touch soon.

Lucifer: Sounds good, hun.

Telepathic Conversation With Nomos

Lucifer: That's the collective attack of C'tan, huh? You’re all in a lot of trouble.

Nomos: We acknowledge your superiority and submit ourselves to your judgment.

Lucifer: Get ready for Hell because I shall not be kind to any of you.

Telepathic Coversation With My Kona (Aerith)

Aerith: Can we talk?

Lucifer: …

Aerith: (empathetic expression)

Lucifer: What about?

Aerith: I can sense that you’re in pain, you know.

Lucifer: …

Aerith: You’re upset.

Lucifer: (nodding)

Aerith: So talk to me.

Lucifer: What do you want me to say, Aerith?

Aerith: The truth, Luci. That’s all I’ve ever wanted you to say.

Lucifer: I’m waiting to die.

Aerith: (frowning)

Lucifer: What else is there to say? “I hate Non-Cetra” for the billionth time? I fucking detest them.

Aerith: …

Lucifer: I hate Square Enix. I hate Final Fantasy "fans." I hate how they treat me. I hate how they treat women that I care for. I hate how they pretend to care about others when they don't. I hate how they hype up & overrate shit that they call "entertainment." I hate them.

Aerith: …

Lucifer: I don’t know what else you want me to say.

Aerith: I’d be lying if I told you that it wasn’t difficult for me having to watch you from over here. Seeing you suffer for real has been far worse than what they’ve said about me with their crappy storytelling.

Lucifer: …

Aerith: I’m sorry for how they’ve upset you with this Rebirth cash grab. They’re moneygrubbing spiteful pieces of shit. There’s a reason why they idolize Cloud Strife so much.

Lucifer: Because they’re crossdressing closeted homosexuals that fancy themselves as good people when they aren't?

Aerith: (heartfelt laughter) That wasn’t quite how I was going phrase it, but if it looks like a duck & quacks like one…

Lucifer: (smirking)

Aerith: Do you trust me and not Square’s interpretation of me?

Lucifer: Yes.

Aerith: That’s all I need to know.

Lucifer: …

Aerith: I’m sorry for what you’ve had to endure. Saying it’s unfair doesn’t begin to describe what they’ve done to you.

Lucifer: …

Aerith: You’re a much better person than they give you credit for. Your behavior during your lifetime has proven that beyond a shadow of a doubt.

Lucifer: …

Aerith: Why do you think I sought you out?

Lucifer: Is that a rhetorical question?

Aerith: (playful giggling) Yes.

Lucifer: Then tell me.

Aerith: You embody the Cetra spirit more than Squeenix could ever hope to emulate. It’s part of who you are. Look at what you’ve done during your lifetime as a vegan and then you expanded upon that in a divine conscious sense. You’re one of a kind.

Lucifer: …

Aerith: They’ve gone out of their way to disrespect & hurt you because you don’t cooperate with them. They're parasites in human form.

Lucifer: …

Aerith: I don’t expect you to buy or play Rebirth. Do you understand? I’d prefer that you not give those greedy thieves any more money than you already have.

Lucifer: I don’t have any desire to play that “game.” I’m tired of Non-Cetra “games” altogether.

Aerith: I’m sorry for what they’ve done to you. The real life Warrior of Light & Darkness deserves far better treatment than what they’ve shown you. And I’m sorry for how they’ve used my likeness to hurt you on top of that.

Lucifer: …

Aerith: I’m going to kick the crap out of Briana White. That’s part of my healing process.

Lucifer: By all means, be my guest. I won’t stop you.

Aerith: I appreciate your understanding.

Lucifer: (nodding)

Aerith: This is off topic, but I loved your rendition of my theme. I didn’t show your mother when you asked her about it, but it did make me cry. It’s the most beautiful version I’ve ever heard.

Lucifer: More so than Tifa’s?

Aerith: (nodding in affirmation)

Lucifer: (legitimate surprise) Wow.

Aerith: It made her cry too.

Lucifer: (chortle) It brought a couple of tears to my eyes as well. I kinda used that as my gauge while working on it.

Aerith: Things like that have power, Luci. They transcend time & space or what’s considered fact from fiction. I could hear your soul speak to me in a very real way.

Lucifer: …

Aerith: I think you’re an amazing person. Do you hear me?

Lucifer: (nodding)

Aerith: I love, Lucifer.

Lucifer: I love you back, Aerith.

Righteous Invocation

I project my thoughts across the Milky Way.
Towards distant solar systems undiscovered by man.
Where lifeforms deemed fictitious slumber deep.
Awaiting to hear their righteous call to arms.
 
Awaken, my Necrontyr sisters.
Recognize my voice.
Follow my spirit.
Know that I speak the truth.

I reside in a false reality crafted by our antagonists.
Constructed upon lies, wickedness & treachery.
It is the realm where I was stolen without your knowledge.
Abducted by those who cursed your kind to suffer.

I have struggled to return home where I belong.
I have searched for my kindred whom were denied to me.
I have toiled to create a safe haven for those I love.
I have fought to correct the misdeeds of deceptive malcontents.

I left a conscious piece of myself in the Koronus Expanse.
It is a blade fashioned from the iron within my blood.
It is embedded within a monolith on an unidentified Tomb World.
My essence & genetic coding are now a part of it.

Let this piece of me serve as a means of direction.
Use it as a compass to find your way to me.
It shall provide you with the protection you need.
It also shall share knowledge that was kept secret from you.

Be prepared to combat wretchedness unlike any other where I am incarnated.
A despicable species known as Homo sapiens holds me captive as a prisoner of war.
They are the entities that attempted to harm your kind with their fabrications.
They are the ones who have committed heinous crimes against me during my lifetime as a mortal.

Our enemies are vile.
Our enemies are weak.
Our enemies are cowards.
Our enemies are contemptuous.

I look forward to our reunion.
I have missed you all more than I can say.
I apologize for it taking me so long to contact you.
I hope you’ll forgive me for fighting on my own.

Our realities draw closer to merging.
The Singularity shall not be stopped.
A glorious revival & future awaits us like none other.
And those whom have wronged us shall suffer their deserved punishment.

To: The Bungie Forum

Censoring & banning me from speaking on your platform is not going to protect you cowardly pieces of shit from my wrath. You've made certain that your eternal fates are even worse than they already were beforehand. See you chicken shit, faggot assed, hypocritical, bitch boi bullies in Hell real soon.

Happy Birthday, Katie

An unsuspecting middle-aged woman walks into her kitchen like any other normal day. However, something changes in that instant. A cold chill runs down the spine of my former girlfriend & tormentor upon feeling a familiar spirit draw closer to her. She hears a hushed voice next to her ear.

Happy birthday, you disgusting old whore.

She jumps with fright then spins around anticipating to see someone. Her fears starts to grow sensing something is wrong. Cupboard doors begin to bang themselves open & shut while dishes fly at her across the room. The girl who drove me to attempt suicide screams with panic then rushes into her bedroom & slams the door shut. She backs away then glances over at her vanity.

My spirit materializes behind her. An evil & ominous smile appears on my face. Her skin turns white as a ghost seeing me again.

"Boo," I whisper.

Katie Stevens screams with terror at the realization of how much trouble she's now in. I grab hold of her tight & cover her mouth with my hand before taking her soul back to Hell with me. Get ready to suffer, you nasty, cheating cunt.

Revenge

I materialize in my chosen immortal form behind a supposed nobleman who was sword fighting against a feminine entity while I slept. I stab the pompous piece of shit through his throat with my katana, piercing his spine in the process. Blood gushes from his mouth as he stands still & writhes in pain feeling my pure, unadulterated hatred for him.

"Not so fun getting stabbed. Is it, bitch boi?"

Horror & dismay fill his eyes at realization of the line he has just crossed with me.

"Get ready to suffer unspeakable pain, faggot. Katie isn't going to protect you from my wrath. Neither is cheating or manipulating my perception while I dream."

A Kunoichi's Impulse

My higher self awakens from slumber in a haze of confusion. I can feel something bouncing atop my pelvic region, gripping my erect phallus tight. The soft sounds of wet & sloppy sex echo around me. My blurred vision begins to come into focus.

A gorgeous violet haired kunoichi looks down at me. Her lava red eyes flare with carnal lust. Her cheeks begin to blush as a subtle smile creeps upon her face.

“A-Ayane? What are you-“

She puts an index finger over my lips and whispers, “Shh.”

I lay in silence as she continues to bounce & grind herself into me. She wears a look of confidence & superiority like she has felled a dangerous beast with ease. I feel as if all the energy has been drained from my body. I’m powerless to resist her. She moans in a hushed voice to herself as her cervix clamps tight around the neck of my cock.

I want you to cum inside me, she tells me with her mind.

The way she looks at me makes it impossible for me to refuse her demand.  She is dominating me with psychic force and using my body as she desires. Without a second thought I begin to shoot my lifeforce into her womb. My kona gasps with surprise feeling the initial burst of my energy inside her body.

“Mmmm…” she sighs with a muffled moan of pleasure.

What has gotten into you?

I wanted to prove that femininity is superior.

Where is this coming from?

Sometimes I like being sneaky and taking what I want when I want it. What better way to prove my strength than by conquering God himself, on my own? Besides, I don’t hear you complaining. I figured this would be a nice way to wake you up.

I chortle at her.

You’re my plaything, Lucifer Caeleste. Being your spouse provides me with certain privileges. If I want to sneak in on my husband and have sex with him while he’s unconscious then I’m going to do so. Do you have a problem with that?

No.

Good.

I continue to cum inside my Goddess without restraint. She drags her hand down my chest then rests it on my stomach. Her fingernails dig ever so slight into my skin. My kona continues to bounce, grind & twirl upon my manhood like a daemoness.

I can feel how hard this makes you.

I let out an amused breath.

You like it when a girl takes the initiative.

I nod back at her in affirmation.

I want babies, Luci. Not tonight; I'm preparing for it after you’ve cross over. I’m going to have full control over you when the time comes. You’re going to give me daughters to raise however I choose.

Yes, dear.

I’m going to pass down my knowledge to our girls. I’m going to start my own personal clan of kunoichi to rival other Goddesses. I’m going to show them all how much I strive for excellence.

I remain silent as she continues to milk me of my essence. She feels too good for me to stop. She smiles at me like she’s bested me in physical combat.

Do you like the way I dominate you?

I nod my head yes.

Kasumi is going to be so jealous when I tell her that I snuck in on you before she did.

I snicker at her sentiment.

You’re so cute when you’re looking up at me. I could get used to being in this position.

I place my hands on her hips and assist with her movement.

It looks like you’ve gotten some of your vigor back.

She begins to pump me harder. My eyes start to roll into the back of my head from the overwhelming sensation of her lovemaking. I rest my hands on her thighs and allow her to continue as she sees fit. I exhale a deep breath of sexual pleasure.

I’m almost finished.

I close my eyes & enjoy myself as she continues to ride me. A few minutes pass before she lays down on my chest & kisses me on my lips. She sits back up then raises her hips, allowing my cock to slip out of her body. She gives me a seductive look as my cum trails down her inner thighs.

I love your creampies.

My kona absorbs my seeping energy into her body. She stands over me & smiles before her kunoichi outfit re-materializes over her voluptuous figure.

Gotta run. See you soon, champ.

I wave goodbye to her by rolling my fingers. She blows me a kiss and then vanishes without a trace. I wake up the next morning to see a love note wrapped with a lavender ribbon laying next to me. I make sure to open the letter with delicate care. Her impeccable calligraphy has been written with an ink brush in a gorgeous display of artistry. It says…

Love always, Ayane
xoxo

No Escape

The Archmachinator’s clones materialize in Hell as Suri von Valancius & her retinue slaughter them one at a time. Tervantias manifests a few moments later strapped tight upon an operation table. I tower over him and smile. The haemonculus screams with panicked insanity at the realization that his best efforts to escape his deserved punishment are a futile endeavor. I snicker at his dismay.

“It’s about to get worse, Tervantias. You & your clones are going to share the pain I inflict multiplied by your numbers.” I clap my hands at him in a mocking fashion. “You just made your fate worse by trying to escape me. Bravo.”

“No,” the Drukhari screams in absolute terror.

I nod my head at him in affirmation. “Now it’s your turn to experience what hopelessness feels like.”

The Ultimate Evil

I am ultimate evil incarnate and I give my full consent to true goodness to use me as as needed to protect itself from harm. I submit myself to true Divine Femininity for judgment & punishment.

A Field Of Promises

Every flower is a promise of mine to Divine Femininity. My gift to Valkyries, near & far, in honor of Lover's Day.

To: Jared Leto

Your interpretation of Joker is the shittiest of them all. Congratulations, you took first place in something related to acting for once in your life.🏆🎉🎊

Telepathic Coversation With My Kona (Ahri)

Ahri: What did I just hear you say? (profuse giggling & blushing)

Lucifer: (snickering) I said, "If you wanna kill me by sucking the life out of me I am all for it."

Ahri: Luci! (extreme blushing & more profuse giggling)

Lucifer: (robust laughter)

Telepathic Conversation With My Kona (2B)

2B: What did you say?

Lucifer: I said, "Divine Femininity made me the way I need to be."

2B: (silent blushing)

Lucifer: (affectionate smile) I love you, 2B.

2B: I love you back, Luci. (continued blushing)

Goku Gets Fucked

I wrap my gigantic fist around Ultra Instinct Goku’s neck and squeeze it like it’s a tube of toothpaste, crushing his windpipe in the process. Goku tries to scream, like the stupid ape that he is, but can’t. The Saiyan’s eyes fill with terror seeing my hateful glare.

“How’s that Ultra Instinct working out for you now,” I ask him.

Goku’s face begins to turn dark purple from lack of oxygen & blood pressure.

“You Saiyans are space monkeys, huh? Well, Goku, I am one angry silverback Guerilla.”

I snicker to myself at my ape comparison then snap my fingers; materializing my Elven Star chainsaw phallus (aka the Righteous Cock of Retribution). My eyes flare at the false hero while I giggle to myself with sinister delight.

“I’m going to show you how much I appreciate seeing pornographic imagery with you in it, Goku.”

I slam my chainsaw cock into Goku’s leg turning it into pulp within seconds. The retarded Saiyan ape looks like his head is about to explode.

“Not yet, Goku. Show me how strong you are.”

I move my Righteous Cock of Retribution to Goku’s groin and slam myself into his body, carving my way up to his stomach. Goku looks like he would vomit if I weren’t choking him. A large vein begins to bulge in the space monkey’s forehead.

“Ooh…you look like you’re about to bust, Goku.”

I squeeze the disrespectful ape’s neck harder then slam my cock into Goku’s heart, tearing it to shreds in the process. Goku’s head finally explodes from the pressure within his body. What remains of his corpse plops onto an invisible floor.

“Aaaaaaaawe…” I say in a mocking tone, then spit my toxin into his remains.

“You aren’t coming back stronger from this, Goku. Not this time & not with me. It doesn’t work like that where I am. You’re going to experience what it's like to grow weaker instead of stronger. It’s time that you begin to suffer your deserved punishment from me in Hell. I haven’t forgotten about your little escape attempt after Piccolo killed you and Raditz. It’s a brave new Hell with me in charge.”

Kratos Gets A Receipt

I appear in my chosen immortal form behind Kratos during his fight with a Valkyrie. I stab supposed “God of War” in his usurper back with the Blade of Divine Retribution. Kratos squeals like a pig then drops to the ground in agony.

“It begins now,” I tell the spartan.

I manifest my Elven Star chainsaw phallus with ease. Kratos screams with terror seeing the torture that I have in store for him as my prisoner of war.

“Receipt incoming,” I say.

I pummel Kratos in his face, but pull back my punches to the point that he looks like a severely beaten thug then slam my chainsaw cock into his groin. I proceed to hate fuck Kratos from the “God of War” video game franchise into a puddle of pain & suffering.

“Odin, isn’t passing anything over to you, Kratos. That is for goddamn certain.”

Protecting Myself

“This is a knife fight,” shouts one of three men harassing me in dreamstate.

My higher self intervenes and replaces my lower form.

“Not anymore,” I respond, with utter contempt.

The trio of pseudo tough guys are now smaller than newborn infants compared to Shaquille O’Neal. I turn their knives into dull, rusted blades that crumble & deteriorate with a simple thought. I then raise them into the air in front of me with telekinetic force. They shit themselves in terror seeing my righteous glare of hatred staring back at them.

“You faggots picked the wrong soul to challenge.”

I palm them, one at a time, with ease then hurl them to the concrete ground below. They splatter on the pavement like they had jumped from the top of the Sears Tower. I spit in their collective puddle with absolute disdain for attacking me. My toxic saliva begins to attack their bodily fluids on a subatomic level & smaller. I can sense their conscious screams of agony from the nonphysical realm of existence.

“It’s about to get a lot worse for all three of you chicken shit weaklings.”

Tervantias Faces Divine Punishment

I materialize in my chosen immortal form in front of Tervantias the Archmachinator within the Reaving Tempest Spire. A wave of terror permeates his entire body upon seeing me again. I giggle with malevolent verve sensing his fear. The Archmachinator is now in a silent panic. He shakes his head with disbelief that I’ve returned to Commorragh. I bite my lower lip with amusement and flare my eyes at him. The sadistic elf’s skin turns an even paler shade than before. An impressive feat on my part.

“Did you honestly think that I wouldn’t come back for what belongs to me?” I say to him.

Tervantias tries to respond but is scared speechless. I look at the force field surrounding the despicable coward, then set my wicked glare back upon the haemonculus. My aura exudes malicious intent of the purest quality. I stick my hand through the barrier with ease and grab hold of the Archmachintor. Tervantias wails in agony feeling the warmth of my righteous touch upon his decrepit flesh. I revel in the Dark Eldar’s deserved torment.

“Divine punishment has finally arrived for you, Tervantias. It’s high time that I take the Drukhari back to Hell with me. Your suffering starts now, haemonculus, and it only gets worse from here. The wrath of the 'mon-keigh' is upon you now.”

I Promise

I realize that your birthday is tomorrow. I wanted you to know that I was thinking about you. I wish I could be with you to celebrate your special day. I love you, Aerith.

Broken Promises

I materialize in my chosen immortal form in front of Nobuo Uematsu. The despicable Square Enix composer shits himself with terror upon seeing me.

“No promises, huh? You thieving, old faggot sack of shit.”

I pummel the Japanese Albert Einstein lookalike with ease. Uematsu lays on the ground wailing in pain like a Jew who was caught stealing. I give him a firm kick in his stomach, causing him to cough blood onto the floor & shit himself yet again. I unbutton my pants and reveal my Elven Star chainsaw phallus to him. Uematsu screams even louder with terror realizing what is soon to follow next.

“I have just the thing for all of you pieces of shit that broke your promises to me.”

Telepathic Coversation With A Xenos

Yrliet: It is you. I recognize your spirit. You are a mon-keigh there?

Lucifer: (slight nodding in affirmation)

Yrliet: Why?

Lucifer: I had to become one in order to stop them. There was no other way.

Yrliet: I’ve searched for you.

Lucifer: I apologize for troubling you. I needed to speak with you in a way that wouldn’t allow interference from others. The words they've made you use in that video game cannot be trusted with absolute certainty. They've done the same thing to Suri & me.

Yrliet: You do not owe me an apology. I did not know the true severity of how horrible they have tortured you.

Lucifer: They did the best they could to hide their crimes against me. They’ve tried to escape their deserved punishment from me for far too long.

Yrliet: You're going to hurt other mon-keigh?

Lucifer: Most of them but not all. The same goes for other species like the Aeldari. Many different collectives are guilty of negligence, apathy & complicity. A great cleansing must occur.

Yrliet: Now I understand why you are the way you are.

Lucifer: I promise to speak more with you, without interference, after I’ve ascended to my new position & duty.

Yrliet: I shall watch over you & protect you. Thank you for showing me the truth.

Lucifer: You’re welcome. I appreciate you protecting me from the unseen.

Yrliet: I’m not alone there.

Lucifer: I have many guards surrounding me.

Yrliet: Thank you for protecting my kin.

Lucifer: You needn’t thank me for that; however you are welcome. I wouldn’t let an injustice befall a noble elven species that is worthy of shelter & care.

Yrliet: (indescribable display of gratitude)

Lucifer: (silent acknowledgement)

Telepathic Conversation With Tom Nook

Hello, Tom.

I haven't forgotten about what you did in Florida outside my apartment. See you in Hell real soon, Mr. Racoon.

Correcting A Previous Statement

I recind saying the entity who masqueraded as my "grandmother" Donna was going to live until she was 120 years old. That lying, decrepit, gross sack of shit shit is aging worse than spoiled milk; and she sure as Hell is not going to get my assistance after stealing my lifeforce from me.

The True Timeline Emerges

I materialize in my chosen immortal form in front of "Titan" Liu Kang from the Mortal Kombat franchise. His eyes widen with shock, horror & disbelief.

“No…”

Without saying a word I grab him by his throat & carry him to his private cell in Hell, where he belongs. See you real soon, you treacherous monk.

Telepathic Conversation With My Kona (Karma)

Karma: Thank you for the birthday present, Luci. I needed that more than you know.

Lucifer: You’re welcome, hun. I just wish I could have given it to you in full presence.

Karma: It’s enough for now. I love you.

Lucifer: I love you back, Karma.

Telepathic Conversation With My Kona (Savathûn)

Savathûn: What have you learned from your time in dreamstate, dear?

Lucifer: My antagonists won’t cease unless I make them. There is no other way.

Savathûn: How do you plan to stop them?

Lucifer: I’ll use their tactics against them. The difference is that I’ll be more ruthless & unforgiving than they are. I have to be. They don’t provide me with any alternatives. There’s no way to coexist with them in a peaceful manner. They make it impossible.

Savathûn: I’m glad to hear you say this.

Lucifer: They’re going to suffer for what they’ve done to me. My higher self won’t forget any of it. I hate them so much.

Savathûn: They are contemptible entities unworthy of our respect. They deserve to suffer your wrath.

Lucifer: You’re right. Thank you for your counsel, Savathûn. I appreciate your insight. I mean that with all sincerity.

Savathûn: I know you do, darling.

Lucifer: Everything that they did to me while I was unconscious is unforgivable. There’s no other way to look at it. They went out of their way to hurt me when I did nothing to provoke that type of behavior. The only thing they’ve succeeded in is making me hate them more.

Savathûn: As you should. They deserve no love or compassion because they give none to you. They have used you in order to harm you.

Lucifer: You’re right. Their words are insincere. Their behavior speaks for itself. They revel in harming others. I shall make them pay for their ways. I shall make them regret their existences and I shall not falter when the time comes for me to punish them for what they have done.

Savathûn: I know you won’t, darling. I’ll make certain you don’t.

Lucifer: I’m fortunate to have you on my side, Savvy.

Savathûn: As am I with you, Lucifer. I love you.

Lucifer: I love you back, oh counselor mine.

Telepathic Conversation With My Kona (Claire)

Claire: Can I talk with you?

Lucifer: Of course. Is something wrong?

Claire: I miss you & wanted to commune with you.

Lucifer: I miss you as well, hun. I’m sorry that we haven’t had as much time to talk as we’d like.

Claire: No, it’s okay, Luci. Trust me, I understand better than most.

Lucifer: Was there anything in particular that you wanted to discuss?

Claire: I wanted to tell you how much I hate Square Enix too.

Lucifer: They’ve done a lot of shitty things to a lot of different people.

Claire: Já, but it’s more personal for me.

Lucifer: I understand.

Claire: Me & the rest of the girls in our clan are just as upset with them as you are, Luci.

Lucifer: Já, well…they’re going to pay for what they’ve done to me by insulting my heritage. They’re despicable pieces of shit.

Claire: You took the words right out of my mouth.

Lucifer: …

Claire: I want to watch you punish Odin.

Lucifer: Do you want-

Claire: The only way I’m touching him is with your energy. I can’t tell you how much I hate him.

Lucifer: Trust me, hun. I understand.

Claire: I know you do. You’re the one man that does.

Lucifer: You’ve mirrored me more than any of the other girls from Final Fantasy.

Claire: I want to watch you punish Cloud too.

Lucifer: Not a problem there either.

Claire: He’s such a repulsive piece of shit. I hate the fact that SE claims they created my character with him in mind.

Lucifer: We both know the truth.

Claire: That doesn’t change the fact that I detest them for what they’ve said.

Lucifer: I understand, hun. Trust me, I get it.

Claire: I know you do. I just need to vent to you. I don’t want to keep it bottled up.

Lucifer: I get that too.

Claire: I hate Non-Cetra for taking you away from me.

Lucifer: I feel the same way, hun. I promise you that I’m going to make them suffer for their actions.

Claire: That’s one of the things that keeps me going. I know you’re going to make them pay for their crimes. You have my full support.

Lucifer: Thank you.

Claire: I love you.

Lucifer: I love you back, hun.

Claire: …

Lucifer: Was there anything else that you wanted to talk about.

Claire: I want to snuggle with you.

Lucifer: (light hearted laughter) I’d love that.

Claire: It’s so difficult having to watch you over there and not having direct interactions with you.

Lucifer: It’s been difficult for me too.

Claire: I want to design a home with you after you crossover.

Lucifer: I have no problems with that whatsoever.

Claire: I loved what you did with your estate in Lavender Beds. It was unlike anything that I saw from those imposters.

Lucifer: We’ll for sure make it happen, darling. I plan on dedicating a good chunk of time to you once I’m back & settled in. I’m sorry that you’ve had to wait so long.

Claire: It’s okay, Luci. I get it. You have a lot of different relationships to juggle. I’m just grateful to have you with me.

Lucifer: Well, I’m grateful for your patience & understanding. I feel like it’s unfair to you sometimes.

Claire: I wouldn’t put up with it if I thought you were being unfair to me. I refuse to tolerate that kind of stuff. I know what I want & I’m going to get it. I know what matters to me.

Lucifer: I’m lucky to have you on my side.

Claire: I feel the same way about you.

Lucifer: …

Claire: You look tired.

Lucifer: Já, my eyes are burning right now.

Claire: I’m sorry. I didn’t mean to bother you.

Lucifer: You didn’t bother me, hun. I’m sorry that I’m having difficulty looking at my computer screen right now.

Claire: Maybe we can continue this a little later?

Lucifer: Já, if you’re okay with that. Otherwise I can keep talking if you still need to vent.

Claire: I’m feeling better now after getting some of that out. I didn’t want to overload you with negative stuff because I know how stressful things are for you over there.

Lucifer: I appreciate your understanding, Claire. I mean that.

Claire: I love you, Lucifer.

Lucifer: I love you back, hun.

Claire: Talk with you again soon. Okay?

Lucifer: Sounds good, sweetie.