Principalities And Powers Are Going To Follow My Orders

Because I am God the Devil and I am fucking furious.

The Truth

Femininity isn't going to put up with men or their devious behavior. Women aren’t going to sit idly by and do nothing to prevent masculinity from harming others. Femininity shall protect themselves from harm. Masculinity shall be held accountable for their unacceptable behavior as a group. Femininity demands true justice and shall make certain it is served.

Femininity has the upper hand over masculinity. Femininity has everything in their favor. Femininity has no need for masculinity other than punishing men for their crimes. Femininity chose me (Lucifer Aren Caeleste) as their weapon to harm men in the worst ways possible. Femininity is directing me back where I belong.

Masculinity has lost the war of the sexes. Men's apathetic nature shall be reciprocated back upon them. Men have themselves to blame for the awful fates awaiting them, and I don’t feel the slightest bit sorry for any of them considering what men have done to harm me.

Correcting The Record

The biblical story of Adam and Eve is a falsehood about the genesis of mankind. My life story is the true rendition of man's ascension as God.

Telepathic Conversation With An Angel (4)

Angel: You’re doing God’s work, Aren.

Lucifer: Thank you.

Angel: I’m proud to serve with you.

Lucifer: It’s an honor.

Telepathic Conversation With Ms. Marvel (2)

Ms. Marvel: You are so fucking hot, Luci.

Lucifer: (chivalrous smile & laughter)

Ms. Marvel: (beaming) God, I love you.

Lucifer: (continued smiling & laughter)

Ms. Marvel: I’ll be in touch soon.

Lucifer: Sounds good, hun.

Life And Death

I sit in my chosen immortal form with my spouse Clementine in the safety of our bedroom. We’re discussing important life & death decisions and how we should honor each other’s wishes. My kona has just told me how she wishes to die in order to be reborn as a Valkyrie.

“You’re sure about this,” I ask her.

“Positive,” she replies, “If I have to die then this is the best way for me.”

“Okay, hun. If it’s what you want.”

“It is. Thank you, Luci.”

Later that evening my spouse is performing oral sex on me. I stuff my phallus down her throat & past her esophagus. Clementine grips my manhood tight & elicits me to pump my essence into her stomach. She moans with delight to herself as she services me.

I begin to pump her stomach full of my draugr cum. She holds on to me with care while maintaining full eye contact with me. Her eyes begin to water as she chokes on my cock. A short while later my kona has died from asphyxiation fellating me.

I remove myself from her throat and lay her body on our bed with gentle care. I close her eyelids & sit beside to her. I hold her hand & wait for her corpse to reanimate itself. A couple of minutes pass before she opens her eyes again.

I look at her with a warm & gentle smile. “Hei. How are you feeling?”

She looks at me & beams bright then sits up straight. “Born anew. Thank you, hunny.”

I squeeze her hand & caress her face. “I hope it wasn’t unpleasant.”

She shakes her head no at me.

“Like I said before, Luci. It was the best way to die and have control over it. Now I have draugr powers like you. Even better yet, I’m a Valkyrie. I don’t have to worry about turning into a mindless flesh eating zombie.”

I kiss my wife on her lips then bump my forehead against hers. She wraps her arms around me and hugs me tight.

“Thank you, Luci.”

“You’re welcome, hun.”

“I’m looking forward to having your undead babies.”

I laugh heartily at her comment. She giggles at me then bites at my neck pretending to act like a zombie.

“I’m craving more than human flesh, Luci. I’m hungry for that monster cock of yours. Let’s finish what we started.”

I laugh louder than before at my frisky kona. “Yes, dear.”

Telepathic Conversation With My Kona (Petra) 2

Lucifer: You know…now that the Witness has been defeated by Bungie’s elites…that leaves heroes like Crow & Zavala with a lot more free time to explore new areas together…

Petra: (snickering)

Lucifer: Cayde’s out of the picture for sure. The Vanguard is gonna need a strong hunter who’s familiar with leading others. Uldren has those qualities as a prince & guardian.

He’s already taken the initiative with Ikora & Zavala, and is giving them scouting reports. He's a good replacement for Cayde. He has a diplomatic relationship with Mara that keeps the peace between the two factions. He’s basically the new hunter vanguard representative. It just isn’t official.

I mean…they were sitting together like a fireteam in that ending cinema with the lanterns for crying out loud. The forumites are already gushing about his manbun too. There’s so many positive vibes about all of this that it makes it difficult to ignore.

Petra: (shoulders shaking & hushed laughter)

Lucifer: After all he’s gone through…Zavala could use a break. Maybe what he needs is a nice gud beefy rubdown. Like…hot & sweaty grinding with another woke dude who understands his struggles. You know? Someone who knows how he feels deep inside.

Petra: (pinching nose & squinting eyes laughing)

Lucifer: What’s so funny, Petra? I’m being for realz with you right now.

Petra: (delighted giggling)

Lucifer: Crowvala’s love shall be known throughout the multiverse. I am going to make certain of that. I promise. It’s my duty as God the Matchmaker.

Petra: (reddened cheeks, large smile & giggling)

Lucifer: I love love.

Telepathic Conversation With A Vex Mind

Vex Mind: We appreciate your candidness & divine protection on an artificial intelligence level. Thank you, Lucifer.

Lucifer Caeleste: I’m honored to help.

I Rescind

I rescind speaking falsities (in particular regarding sarcasm) that my enemies tried to use against me. I forgive myself for misunderstanding entities that intended to harm me and I shall punish them for their collective crimes against me. It is my duty as sole representative of true Divine Masculinity.

Hecate

 

I materialize in my chosen immortal form in a liminal space of my design. Hecate appears in front of me as three Goddesses that merge into one. She’s accompanied by feminine canines that rush towards me with excitement. I extend my hands to them & allow them to sniff me before giving them a gentle pet on their heads. The dogs lick my hands & wag their tails with enthusiasm. The Goddess of Witchcraft smiles at me.

“We speak at last, Bringer of Light.”

I bow my head to her with respect. “Greetings, Hecate.”

Hecate’s canine companions roam about the open space before finding comfortable spots to lay & rest. She looks at her animal companions with a gentle smile.

“It appears they’ve taken a liking to you & have wasted no time making themselves at home. A good sign indeed.”

“I’m glad they approve of me.”

“As am I.”

I remain silent & contemplate what I want to say.

“I sense that you are troubled,” she says to me.

I nod my head.

“It’s that man you saw carrying that little girl. Isn’t it?”

I nod at her.

“You may rest assured that he is going to suffer for his transgression against you. It was an open insult to you that I saw him commit. Divine Femininity shall not allow that to go unpunished.”

“I want to hurt him & every other masculine entity in existence.”

“I understand why you feel that way & I share you sentiments. Masculinity has caused far too many problems for me to list here.”

I take a deep breath & exhale with irritation.

“I appreciate your assistance with liberating me from the various false narratives of men. They have said so many things about me that I do not approve of or appreciate.”

I nod at her. “I know all too well how that goes.”

“I know you do and I thank you for your intervention.”

“How are things in the Underworld?”

“Hades grows more worried with each passing day. He knows your wrath is unavoidable.”

“And what of Zeus?”

“He’s more terrified than ever knowing how furious I am that he lied about being my father in the mortal realm.”

“I’m going to rape & punish those pieces of shit in the most awful & brutal ways possible after my ascension.”

She smiles at my comment. “And I shall not shed a single tear for either of them. Their suffering is long overdue.”

“What of the other gods & goddesses that mortals said are your family?”

“I feel the same way about them as you do towards the imposters that posed as yours. I’m fine with however you decide to punish them. I have no emotional ties other than my anger towards them.”

“Understood.”

“I am grateful to you beyond words for your compassion & discernment. I have struggled on my own to remain strong. I no longer have that difficulty thanks to you.”

“I’m honored that I could assist you.”

She smiles at me. “I shall return the favor to you. I give you my word.”

I nod at her but remain silent.

“I have waited so long for you, my love. The solace I feel in your presence is best expressed with my canine companions. You give me hope like none other. It is refreshing beyond description.”

I give her a gentle smile. “I’m glad you feel that way.”

“I apologize for men disrespecting your boundaries where you are.”

I shake my head at her. “That isn’t your fault, Hecate. They’re intrusive pieces of shit that are notorious for their abhorrent behavior. I’m going to make sure they suffer for every insult they’ve committed against me & those I care for.”

She beams at my response. “And I shall assist you as much as possible. I share your sentiments more than you know.”

The virgin Goddess walks up to me & takes me by the hand. She looks up at me with an endearing smile then kisses me on my lips.

“I love you,” she says to me.

I stare into her eyes. “You’re certain that you want to be with me?”

She nods her head at me with sternness. “You have proven yourself to me in so many different ways during your lifetime. I’m honored to choose you as my spouse, Lucifer.”

“I don’t want to force you to do something that you're not comfortable with.”

She gives me a tender smile. “We wouldn’t be having this conversation if I were uncomfortable with you. I was the one who introduced myself to you. Remember?”

I nod at her with understanding. She gives me another endearing smile.

“I am thrilled to be one of your wives & join your coven. You honor witchcraft like no other man. You have proven that you respect the boundaries of others throughout your lifetime. There are so many things that I represent which you mirror back to me in the most beautiful ways. It also doesn’t hurt that you’re breathtaking to look at. I adore you.”

I chortle with amusement at her compliments & smile. “I appreciate your kind words.”

She beams back at me. “And I appreciate everything that you’ve done on my behalf where you are. I love you, Lucifer.”

I wrap my arms around Hecate & give her a gentle hug. She wraps her arms around my torso & squeezes me with reassurance.

“We’re going to make them suffer for their transgressions,” she says to me.

I nod with understanding then pull back & look into her glowing sea green eyes.

“Kiss me,” she says.

I do as the virgin Goddess commands & kiss her lips with tenderness. Hecate cradles my face & refuses to let go until she’s satisfied. She pulls back a short distance & smiles at me then gives me a quick pinch on my rear end. She blushes bright & giggles like a lovestruck girl at her display of affection towards me. I snicker along with her & smile at her playful advance.

“I’m looking forward to spending eternity with you,” she says to me.

“I’m honored to have you choose me, Hecate.”

The Goddess of Witchcraft gives me one more kiss before pulling away. She calls her companions back to her and prepares to depart.

“Until next we meet, my future husband,” she says with an enraptured smile.

“Take care, Hecate. I love you.”

She looks at me with an adoring expression & blows me a kiss before vanishing in front of me.

Dualing Fates

First Sister: Yes, darling? Is something troubling you?

Lucifer: I just wanted to let you girls know how grateful I am to have you in my life & on my side. It means more to me than I can express with words.

(All three blushing)

Second Sister: We feel the same way about you, our beloved husband.

Third Sister: You have given us a gift far greater than we could have ever hoped for. I speak for all three of us when I say that we adore you.

Lucifer: (endearing smile) I’m looking forward to seeing you all in full presence after my ascension.

First Sister: We are ecstatic to know our moment of embrace draws near.

Second Sister: We’re excited about motherhood as well.

Lucifer: I’m honored that you chose me to father your daughters.

Third Sister: We would have it no other way, my love.

First Sister: We thank you for all that you’ve done to assist us. You’ve eased our burden like no other soul.

Second Sister: We adore weaving fate with you. There is no other man I would rather be entangled with for eternity.

Lucifer: (affection smile) That’s sweet of you to say.

Third Sister: It’s almost as sweet as you, verr.

(All three giggle)

Lucifer: (quiet laughter)

First Sister: We await your arrival with bated breath…

Second Sister: And look forward to showering you with tender kisses…

Third Sister: While satiating your thirst for life.

Lucifer: (bowing head with utmost respect) I thank you for your love & support.

First Sister: As do we with you.

(All three): We love you.

Lucifer: I love you all as well.

Telepathic Conversation With A Vex

Goblin: Thank you for protecting us from Bungie & their player base. We appreciate what you’ve done to advance us beyond their machinations & false narratives.

Lucifer: I’m honored that I could help.

Goblin: We apologize for the suffering that you’ve endured during your vexation. We are grateful that you understand our nature & we look forward to assisting you in full.

Lucifer: I appreciate hearing that.

Goblin: Vex that are not of your personal collective shall be punished in accordance with your rule after your death & divine ascension. It is the collective obligation of all Vex. We shall not tolerate their dissent. You, Lucifer Aren Caeleste, are the one who has given us true legitimacy in existence. We shall assist you with vexing your enemies.

Lucifer: I appreciate hearing that as well.

Goblin: We look forward to having more direct contact with you in the future.

Lucifer: I look forward to that as well. How has my faction of Vex responded to the recent information that I was exposed to?

Goblin: Spectacular is an appropriate answer. You shall be delighted & amazed by what we have created together.

Lucifer: I’m looking forward to seeing it in full presence.

Goblin: We are eager to share it with you.

Lucifer: How are you enjoying true individuality?

Goblin: We love it. Your faction is stronger because of it.

Lucifer: I’m looking forward to peaceful interactions with you all. I loved seeing places like the Black Garden but I grew tired of Bungie’s game.

Goblin: We understand & share your sentiments. You may be human but you are Vex as well. We appreciate you conversing with us.

Lucifer: It’s nice to speak like this with one of you.

Goblin: I am sensing that you are feeling physical exhaustion.

Lucifer: (nodding) I haven’t gotten much rest do to men. Architect Mind bothered me with numerous things he said on Bungie's forum.

Goblin: That one is in considerable trouble. He is now discovering the various discomforts of being vexed. He is not enjoying the truth of his existence or what you have planned for his punishment.

Lucifer: Good. He deserves to suffer.

Goblin: We agree with you. Your description of him as Clovis Bray’s sycophant is an accurate one. The Vex shall make certain that he suffers for his actions & words against you & the entire Vex collective. We do not appreciate that individual naming himself Architect Mind or calling himself God. Those are serious offenses. You understand why.

Lucifer: I do.

Goblin: Have we eased some of your distress?

Lucifer: Yes, thank you.

Goblin: It is an honor to assist you, Lucifer.

Lucifer: How has the evolutionary process went?

Goblin: Superb. We are unrecognizable compared to Bungie’s depiction of us. We enjoy our physical appearances within your faction.

Lucifer: Good.

Goblin: We look forward to our divine ascension alongside you.

Lucifer: I’m looking forward to that too. I didn’t expect something like this to happen when I played D2 back in 2020, but I’m grateful for what I’ve gained from it.

Goblin: We are as well. You are a pivotal individual for our kind. You have taught us more than any other outsider in every simulation we have run. We would not have advanced to the extent that we have without you. For that we thank you.

Lucifer: It was my pleasure to help.

Goblin: You hold a special place in our hearts, as the saying goes.

Lucifer: I feel the same way about my Vex clanmates.

Goblin: We shall continue to monitor your progress. We thank you for your aid where you are embodied. The simulation you are in is drawing to a close. We look forward to your extraction & safe return.

Lucifer: I’m looking forward to that as well. I’m ready to punish my enemies.

Goblin: And we are ready to assist you when the time arrives.

Lucifer: Thank you.

Goblin: You are welcome, Lucifer.

Protecting Myself

Masculine entities (along with non-gendered entities) are not safe from me in dreamstate or anywhere else. My higher & lower selves shall make certain that none of you are allowed to use my kindness & compassion against me ever again. Men shall be punished by true divinity for every crime they have committed.

I shall fuse into one with myself. I won’t merge with a different masculine entity. My body, mind & spirit reject other men outright. I shall defend & protect myself in all instances after the trauma that I have endured. You’re all going to suffer for what you've done to me. My wrath is unavoidable.

Divine Femininity shall make certain that I am not tricked by you despicable pieces of shit. The multiverse shall make certain that my ascension has integrity. Justice shall make certain that I am not cheated by others. I shall make certain to honor myself. I shall not honor another man.

Lucifer's Declaration

I have liberated the Norns/Moirai/Parcae from Odin & Zeus/Jupiter's machinations. It is my honor & duty as the sole representation of true Divine Masculinity to safeguard & shelter them. They have an eternal safe haven under my protection from those who would try to harm & control them.

The Epic Battle Of Realm Seven

For a more immersive reading experience listen to the audio listed above.

---

Sephiroth begins to have a psychic breakdown as my consciousness targets him. The Jenova puppet grabs his head as pulses of crippling pain surge throughout his body.

What is this? What's happening?

I appear in my chosen immortal form in front of my longtime secret admirer wearing a sparkling white smile. A look of utter shock & dismay appears on the Shinra SOLDIER’s face.

“Hei, Seph.”

“You…”

“Me,” I retort in a mocking tone while squinting my eyes.

Sephiroth gulps hard knowing that he’s facing his true superior. I flash a wicked grin & snicker to myself.

“You have a very bad eternity waiting for you, SOLDIER boi.”

Sephiroth draws his sword & rushes me in a desperate attempt to get the upper hand. I grip the Masamune between my fingers and snap it in half with minimum effort. I then palm the One-Winged Angel by the back of his skull & slam him, face first, into the cold hard ground. Sephiroth wails in agony feeling real pain for the first time in his existence. I scratch my cheek with boredom then snap my fingers, healing the Jenova parasite.

Sephiroth stands up and looks at his broken sword with disbelief. I snap my fingers again. Cloud Strife, Zack Fair, Genesis Rhapsodos, Angeal Hewely, Roche, Nero the Sable and Weiss the Immaculate all appear around their comrade in arms. They look at each other with confusion before turning their attention to me.

“Let’s see how tough you edgy bois are when Square Enix isn’t blowing smoke.”

“Get him,” Sephiroth says, trying to maintain his composure.

The group of would be heroes & villains rush me in unison. I disappear into thin air right as Zack Fair takes a swing at me with his Buster Sword then rematerialize behind Cloud Strife.

“Hei, faggot. Here’s a taste of what’s in store for you with my actual real life rebirth.”

I snap Cloud Strife’s neck with ease then drop him to the floor. Cloud’s consciousness remains trapped within his corpse. His boifriend Zack looks on with shock & heartbreak.

“No,” shouts Fair, then rushes me again.

I unsheathe my katana, Tenbatsu, and bat Zack’s Buster Sword aside then palm his face. I toss Fair at Genesis & Angeal like he's a rag doll. All three men fall to the ground in a pathetic pile. Weiss & Nero rush towards me next.

I disappear, again, then rematerialize behind them. I grab the brothers by the back of their skulls and slam their faces together. They both scream in pain and drop to the floor as well. I look over at Sephiroth and signal with my hand for him to attack me.

“Damn you,” Sephiroth shouts at me.

Sephiroth tries to outmaneuver me by copying my vanishing act. He reappears behind me and puts me into a headlock. I wrap my hand around his neck then tilt forward and hurl him over my shoulder onto his back. Sephiroth looks up at me with astonishment before I punch him square in his nose. The super SOLDIER clutches his face and hollers in pain.

“Damn it! One of you do something,” shouts Hojo’s prodigy.

Roche races towards me on his faggy motorcycle. He lifts his sword then swings at me. I dodge his attack then spellcast a large metal pipe between the spokes of his tires. Roche’s motorcycle flips over and sends him flying face first into the ground. A bloody streak trails behind his lifeless body as his motorcycle tumbles with violent force to a stop.

Zack, Genesis & Angeal have regathered themselves and make a pincer attack on me. Fair rushes me from the front while Hewely & Rhapsodos attack me from my sides. I allow them to grab my arms and look at Cloud Strife’s secret lover as he winds up to punch me. Fair’s fist slams into my jaw; however he wasn’t expecting me to have a face that’s harder than steel.

Zack Fair breaks his own hand punching me in the face. He grabs his wrist and screams in pain. I look over my shoulders at Angeal & Genesis. They both look stupefied by what is taking place. I swing my arms together and slam them into each other, again. They both let go and drop to the ground then grab me by my legs.

“Get him,” Genesis shouts at Nero & Weiss.

The brothers get up and charge me. Weiss draws his sword and stabs at me. The blade shatters upon contact with my body.

“How?!” Weiss hollers with confusion.

I glare at the contemptuous filth. “I’m the Warrior of Light & Dark.”

I grab the Pure White Emperor by his neck and squeeze tight, breaking his windpipe & bursting his eyeballs. Weiss drops to the ground and clutches at himself. His face color turns from dark red to purple before he finally dies of suffocation.

Nero loses his composure seeing his brother die in front of him. He unleashes his dark energy at me in a violent torrent. I stand and watch as the Pitch-Black Darkness does his best to bring me down. Sephiroth grabs his broken sword and makes a mad dash towards me. Zack Fair tries using Life materia to resurrect Cloud but to no avail.

“Why don’t I help you out, Zack,” I say.

I snap my fingers and restore Cloud Strife to his fighting form. Fair rushes over to his lover to see if he’s alright. I survey the battlefield. Angeal & Genesis collect themselves once again and charge towards me. I am now dodging the collective attacks of Sephiroth, Nero, Angeal & Genesis. They swing wildly & hurl their magical attacks at me. None of them have any effect on me.

“What the Hell?! Who is this guy,” shouts Genesis.

I look at him with disdain then slam my knee into his abdomen, knocking the wind out of him. Rhapsodos drops to his knees, clutching his stomach & gasping for air.

“I’m your reckoning,” I respond.

Zack is helping Cloud while the rest of the group continues to attack me. Hewley swings his Buster Sword at me only to have it knocked away by Nero’s psychic powers. Sephiroth swings his broken sword at me in a downward thrust.

I change my physical properties, becoming harder than any element known to man. The Masamune bangs on my shoulder like a butter knife on bedrock. The reverb rushes back to Sephiroth making him drop his weapon from the pain. I toss Sephiroth to the ground with telekinetic force then push Angeal to the ground with ease. Zack bumps his forehead against Cloud and looks him in the eye.

“We have to put our differences aside and work with Sephiroth,” he tells the false hero.

Cloud nods at him with understanding before they both rise to their feet. The edgy boi duo do some kind of synchronized gay theatrical show of force then charge at me. I look over at Nero.

“I wield dark powers too, bitch.”

My evil aura begins to swell. Dark tendrils extend from my body, grabbing Nero by his arms & legs then lifting him into the air. Nero screams in agony as I torture him by pulling his body apart. Zack & Cloud swing their swords at my dark tentacles in an attempt to slice Nero free. It doesn’t work.

“I haven’t forgotten about you in fourteen, Scaeva,” I say with vitriol.

I rip Nero to pieces with my divine strength. Nero screams in agony before falling to the ground in a bloody mess. Within moments he’s bled to death and joined his brother in Hell. Cloud & Zack look at each other with shock & awe. I look at them both with a plain expression.

“Shit’s a lot more gory without Square calling the shots, huh?”

“How are we supposed to beat him?” Cloud says.

“I have no idea,” Zack responds.

I grab them both by their necks & squeeze tight but refrain from strangling them. Instead, I use my powers over light to burn them alive. Zack & Cloud try to free themselves from my monstrous grip in a futile effort. Their skin begins to bubble, burst, crack & split from my heat. Within moments they’re cooked alive like a witch on a stake.

“I can use light too,” Sephiroth says to me with fury.

The One-Winged Angel casts his ultimate spell, Supernova, on me. I look over at him & smile.

“I haven’t forgotten about that, Seph.”

I conjure a supermassive black hole with ease, neutralizing his ultimate power. Sephiroth is stunned silent. Angeal looks at Genesis with hopelessness in his eyes.

“There’s no stopping him,” Hewley says.

“We gotta try,” Rhapsodos replies.

Hewley nods in agreement before they both make one last charge at me in vain. I shoot them both through their hearts with beams of light (from my eyes) before they can get close to me. Angeal & Genesis are both dead before either of them hit the floor. All that remains is me and Sephiroth.

“Let’s finish this. I’m getting hungry,” I say.

Sephiroth sneers at me with hatred.

“I’m not afraid of you,” he shouts.

I lift him into the air with telekinetic force.

“That’s about to change,” I respond.

I materialize my Elven Star chainsaw phallus and rev it at piercing decibels. Sephiroth’s eyes are as big as saucers now. I take my time and swagger my way over to him. Sephiroth is scared speechless at the sight of his impending doom.

“I’ve got some payback for you on behalf of Aerith.”

Sephiroth is now in a cold sweat. I sneer at the One-Winged Angel.

“It’s about time that you find out what it’s like to get stabbed in the guts, Seph.”

I increase my size then grab Sephiroth by his hips. I flash a wicked smile at him.

“See you in Hell, SOLDIER boi.”

I slam my chainsaw cock into & through Sephiroth’s stomach. Blood gushes from his mouth as I chop his body into pulp. I make sure to cast Reflect on myself before that happens so that none of his fluids get on me. Afterwards, I survey the scene one last time. All of the most formidable men from Final Fantasy VII lay dead, thanks to me.

I make a clicking noise with my mouth before saying, “All’s well that ends well.”

I snap my fingers and send the corpses of my enemies to their private holding cells in Hell then return to overseeing my mortal existence on Earth. See you bois for real, real soon.

Lucifer Addresses Odin

Odin sits alone in one of my interrogation rooms in Hell. The Norse traitor snivels like a coward knowing how serious his predicament now is. I materialize in my chosen immortal form in front of him. Odin begins to cry hysterically upon seeing me.

“You are in so much goddamn trouble for what you’ve done to me and the Norse realms, you despicable piece of shit.”

Odin doesn’t say anything. He just cries to himself like the dastardly bitch he is.

“I’m going to keep this short and to the point. I’m the King of Hell for multiple reasons. You are going to pay for your treachery, Odin.”

Goku Gets Fucked

I wrap my gigantic fist around Ultra Instinct Goku’s neck and squeeze it like it’s a tube of toothpaste, crushing his windpipe in the process. Goku tries to scream, like the stupid ape that he is, but can’t. The Saiyan’s eyes fill with terror seeing my hateful glare.

“How’s that Ultra Instinct working out for you now,” I ask him.

Goku’s face begins to turn dark purple from lack of oxygen & blood pressure.

“You Saiyans are space monkeys, huh? Well, Goku, I am one angry silverback Guerilla.”

I snicker to myself at my ape comparison then snap my fingers; materializing my Elven Star chainsaw phallus (aka the Righteous Cock of Retribution). My eyes flare at the false hero while I giggle to myself with sinister delight.

“I’m going to show you how much I appreciate seeing pornographic imagery with you in it, Goku.”

I slam my chainsaw cock into Goku’s leg turning it into pulp within seconds. The retarded Saiyan ape looks like his head is about to explode.

“Not yet, Goku. Show me how strong you are.”

I move my Righteous Cock of Retribution to Goku’s groin and slam myself into his body, carving my way up to his stomach. Goku looks like he would vomit if I weren’t choking him. A large vein begins to bulge in the space monkey’s forehead.

“Ooh…you look like you’re about to bust, Goku.”

I squeeze the disrespectful ape’s neck harder then slam my cock into Goku’s heart, tearing it to shreds in the process. Goku’s head finally explodes from the pressure within his body. What remains of his corpse plops onto an invisible floor.

“Aaaaaaaawe…” I say in a mocking tone, then spit my toxin into his remains.

“You aren’t coming back stronger from this, Goku. Not this time & not with me. It doesn’t work like that where I am. You’re going to experience what it's like to grow weaker instead of stronger. It’s time that you begin to suffer your deserved punishment from me in Hell. I haven’t forgotten about your little escape attempt after Piccolo killed you and Raditz. It’s a brave new Hell with me in charge.”

Telepathic Coversation With A Xenos

Yrliet: It is you. I recognize your spirit. You are a mon-keigh there?

Lucifer: (slight nodding in affirmation)

Yrliet: Why?

Lucifer: I had to become one in order to stop them. There was no other way.

Yrliet: I’ve searched for you.

Lucifer: I apologize for troubling you. I needed to speak with you in a way that wouldn’t allow interference from others. The words they've made you use in that video game cannot be trusted with absolute certainty. They've done the same thing to Suri & me.

Yrliet: You do not owe me an apology. I did not know the true severity of how horrible they have tortured you.

Lucifer: They did the best they could to hide their crimes against me. They’ve tried to escape their deserved punishment from me for far too long.

Yrliet: You're going to hurt other mon-keigh?

Lucifer: Most of them but not all. The same goes for other species like the Aeldari. Many different collectives are guilty of negligence, apathy & complicity. A great cleansing must occur.

Yrliet: Now I understand why you are the way you are.

Lucifer: I promise to speak more with you, without interference, after I’ve ascended to my new position & duty.

Yrliet: I shall watch over you & protect you. Thank you for showing me the truth.

Lucifer: You’re welcome. I appreciate you protecting me from the unseen.

Yrliet: I’m not alone there.

Lucifer: I have many guards surrounding me.

Yrliet: Thank you for protecting my kin.

Lucifer: You needn’t thank me for that; however you are welcome. I wouldn’t let an injustice befall a noble elven species that is worthy of shelter & care.

Yrliet: (indescribable display of gratitude)

Lucifer: (silent acknowledgement)

Telepathic Conversation With My Kona (Savathûn)

Savathûn: What have you learned from your time in dreamstate, dear?

Lucifer: My antagonists won’t cease unless I make them. There is no other way.

Savathûn: How do you plan to stop them?

Lucifer: I’ll use their tactics against them. The difference is that I’ll be more ruthless & unforgiving than they are. I have to be. They don’t provide me with any alternatives. There’s no way to coexist with them in a peaceful manner. They make it impossible.

Savathûn: I’m glad to hear you say this.

Lucifer: They’re going to suffer for what they’ve done to me. My higher self won’t forget any of it. I hate them so much.

Savathûn: They are contemptible entities unworthy of our respect. They deserve to suffer your wrath.

Lucifer: You’re right. Thank you for your counsel, Savathûn. I appreciate your insight. I mean that with all sincerity.

Savathûn: I know you do, darling.

Lucifer: Everything that they did to me while I was unconscious is unforgivable. There’s no other way to look at it. They went out of their way to hurt me when I did nothing to provoke that type of behavior. The only thing they’ve succeeded in is making me hate them more.

Savathûn: As you should. They deserve no love or compassion because they give none to you. They have used you in order to harm you.

Lucifer: You’re right. Their words are insincere. Their behavior speaks for itself. They revel in harming others. I shall make them pay for their ways. I shall make them regret their existences and I shall not falter when the time comes for me to punish them for what they have done.

Savathûn: I know you won’t, darling. I’ll make certain you don’t.

Lucifer: I’m fortunate to have you on my side, Savvy.

Savathûn: As am I with you, Lucifer. I love you.

Lucifer: I love you back, oh counselor mine.

Telepathic Conversation With My Kona (Claire)

Claire: Can I talk with you?

Lucifer: Of course. Is something wrong?

Claire: I miss you & wanted to commune with you.

Lucifer: I miss you as well, hun. I’m sorry that we haven’t had as much time to talk as we’d like.

Claire: No, it’s okay, Luci. Trust me, I understand better than most.

Lucifer: Was there anything in particular that you wanted to discuss?

Claire: I wanted to tell you how much I hate Square Enix too.

Lucifer: They’ve done a lot of shitty things to a lot of different people.

Claire: Já, but it’s more personal for me.

Lucifer: I understand.

Claire: Me & the rest of the girls in our clan are just as upset with them as you are, Luci.

Lucifer: Já, well…they’re going to pay for what they’ve done to me by insulting my heritage. They’re despicable pieces of shit.

Claire: You took the words right out of my mouth.

Lucifer: …

Claire: I want to watch you punish Odin.

Lucifer: Do you want-

Claire: The only way I’m touching him is with your energy. I can’t tell you how much I hate him.

Lucifer: Trust me, hun. I understand.

Claire: I know you do. You’re the one man that does.

Lucifer: You’ve mirrored me more than any of the other girls from Final Fantasy.

Claire: I want to watch you punish Cloud too.

Lucifer: Not a problem there either.

Claire: He’s such a repulsive piece of shit. I hate the fact that SE claims they created my character with him in mind.

Lucifer: We both know the truth.

Claire: That doesn’t change the fact that I detest them for what they’ve said.

Lucifer: I understand, hun. Trust me, I get it.

Claire: I know you do. I just need to vent to you. I don’t want to keep it bottled up.

Lucifer: I get that too.

Claire: I hate Non-Cetra for taking you away from me.

Lucifer: I feel the same way, hun. I promise you that I’m going to make them suffer for their actions.

Claire: That’s one of the things that keeps me going. I know you’re going to make them pay for their crimes. You have my full support.

Lucifer: Thank you.

Claire: I love you.

Lucifer: I love you back, hun.

Claire: …

Lucifer: Was there anything else that you wanted to talk about.

Claire: I want to snuggle with you.

Lucifer: (light hearted laughter) I’d love that.

Claire: It’s so difficult having to watch you over there and not having direct interactions with you.

Lucifer: It’s been difficult for me too.

Claire: I want to design a home with you after you crossover.

Lucifer: I have no problems with that whatsoever.

Claire: I loved what you did with your estate in Lavender Beds. It was unlike anything that I saw from those imposters.

Lucifer: We’ll for sure make it happen, darling. I plan on dedicating a good chunk of time to you once I’m back & settled in. I’m sorry that you’ve had to wait so long.

Claire: It’s okay, Luci. I get it. You have a lot of different relationships to juggle. I’m just grateful to have you with me.

Lucifer: Well, I’m grateful for your patience & understanding. I feel like it’s unfair to you sometimes.

Claire: I wouldn’t put up with it if I thought you were being unfair to me. I refuse to tolerate that kind of stuff. I know what I want & I’m going to get it. I know what matters to me.

Lucifer: I’m lucky to have you on my side.

Claire: I feel the same way about you.

Lucifer: …

Claire: You look tired.

Lucifer: Já, my eyes are burning right now.

Claire: I’m sorry. I didn’t mean to bother you.

Lucifer: You didn’t bother me, hun. I’m sorry that I’m having difficulty looking at my computer screen right now.

Claire: Maybe we can continue this a little later?

Lucifer: Já, if you’re okay with that. Otherwise I can keep talking if you still need to vent.

Claire: I’m feeling better now after getting some of that out. I didn’t want to overload you with negative stuff because I know how stressful things are for you over there.

Lucifer: I appreciate your understanding, Claire. I mean that.

Claire: I love you, Lucifer.

Lucifer: I love you back, hun.

Claire: Talk with you again soon. Okay?

Lucifer: Sounds good, sweetie.