The Valkyrie

 

In the darkest depths of all existence, a Valkyrie’s light shines pure & bright.
Truth & justice are her sword & shield.
She is divine, and she wields the power of life & death.
Her magnanimity is equaled by her cruelty.
She understands the difference between good & evil,
And knows when & where to apply those temperaments.
She is beholden to no individual or group other than her sorority.
Her sisterhood is one forged through dedication & perseverance.
She is a keeper of heritage & a force of nature.
Femininity’s diversity is a part of the Valkyrie’s spectacular strength.

She is kind & caring.
She is hearty & healthy.
She is strong & serious.
She is wise & wonderful.
She is delightful & dangerous.
She is frightening & ferocious.
She is virtuous & valiant.
She is a proud pagan Goddess.
She is a champion worthy of honor & respect.
She is a Shieldmaiden, and she knows her true value.

I look forward to the day when I meet her face to face.
She is my spiritual chaperone & overseer.
Her gloriousness inspires me like none other.
I dedicate my existence to her magnificence.
I yearn to show her how much she means to me.
To feel her loving embrace as she escorts me into the afterlife.
I know that my sacrifice was not in vain.
I shall not betray her trust.
I love her with all my heart,
Because she is the one who saved my soul.

Telepathic Conversation With A Valkyrie (7)

Valkyrie: (soft inflection) Hei.

Lucifer: (tentative smile) Hei.

Valkyrie: (empathetic expression) What’s wrong?

Lucifer: I’m exhausted from being over here. The constant stress about safety concerns makes it difficult for me to relax, even at home. I hate humans so much.

Valkyrie: (affectionate expression) You worry too much.

Lucifer: I can’t help it after everything that I’ve suffered, even more so from what I’ve seen & heard from them.

Valkyrie: I understand. It isn’t easy to break the mental conditioning they did to you after your birth.

Lucifer: That’s part of it, já.

Valkyrie: What else is troubling you?

Lucifer: I hate men. I hate them so goddamn much. I can’t put it into proper words just how much they infuriate me.

Valkyrie: The vast majority of the multiverse feels the same way you do. That includes non-gendered entities.

Lucifer: I’m tired of their psychic attacks & harassment. I’m tired of them questioning my resolve. I’m tired of their naysaying & shit talking me. I’m tried of them trying to goad me into a fight. I’m tired of dealing with my antagonists. I never wanted to have to resort to what I’m going to do after I die, but they’ve left me no other options. I have to be more horrible than what they can imagine. That isn’t something that makes me proud.

Valkyrie: I hope this doesn’t make you angry, but I read your thoughts without your permission. I know one of the things that’s troubling you and I want to address it so that way I can set your mind at ease. If that’s alright with you.

Lucifer: (nodding)

Valkyrie: Masculinity (to a certain extent) has a small power advantage over femininity with regards to humans. I mean, just look at what their scientists have said about the effects that testosterone has on the body & other physical disparities between the two sexes.

We don’t have that over here, Luci. Femininity is so superior to masculinity that it isn’t even a joke. In all honesty, it’s pathetic on masculinity’s part.

You should be less worried about how you’re going to perform in combat against men and more focused on how you plan to triumph over superior feminine adversaries. I don’t mean that to sound disrespectful to you. I’m just trying to convey that you have way more than you bargained for (in a good way) waiting for you on the other side of reality.

The reason femininity loves you as much as we do is because you put everything in our favor with what you’ve done where you are. Femininity has all the advantages & none of the drawbacks because of you. We’re going to spend eternity continuing to make you better by challenging you after you’ve crossed over.

Valkyries are going to take over that role in your life because we’re more effective than your antagonists. That’s the truth. To a certain extent, your existence is going to get easier; but on the other hand, you’re going to face greater challenges from true Divine Femininity than even you could imagine. We want you even better than you already are now, and we’re going to make that happen.

The truth is, Luci, you need to be challenged by others because you excel whenever you are. It’s one of the major reasons why we chose you as our collective verr. You mirror our expectations & determination. It’s part of why we love you so much. The contrast between Valkyries following you or Odin is so extreme that it’s mind boggling. The one comparison there is is that there’s no comparison. That’s how much you’ve empowered us with your work where you are.

You trusted us. You’re going to see for yourself that your faith wasn’t misplaced. I promise you that.

Lucifer: (nodding)

Valkyrie: I love you so much for everything that you’ve done to make Valkyries the most superior entities there are in all existence, even over you. That’s a serious testament to your character, Luci; and it’s something that you should be proud of.

Lucifer: I didn’t mean for it to seem like I’m not proud of Valkyries-

Valkyries: That’s not what I’m implying, Luci. You’re missing the point. I’m telling you that you should have more confidence in yourself. Let go of the self-doubt. They tried to instill that in you because it was the only way that they could "win" using minimum cheating. They can’t win against you in a legitimate fair fight. They aren’t divine. You are, even in your mortal form.

Lucifer: I understand.

Valkyrie: (affectionate smile) Do you feel a little better now.

Lucifer: (nodding) Yes, thank you, hun.

Valkyrie: (blushing & beaming) You’re welcome, my handsome husband & gorgeous God. I love you.

Lucifer: (flattered smile) I love you back, Valkyrie.

The Shieldmaiden

A shieldmaiden sits alone on a black sand beach in ancient Norway. She hangs her head in silence while lost in thought. The sky is dark & overcast. Drizzling rain falls to the ground & impacts with stinging force. Sea salt carries on the wind & covers everything it touches with a light coating. The maiden shivers as frigid gusts create large whitecaps on the tidewater. Surging waves crash against the rocky coast & roar like thunder. I appear in my chosen immortal form & approach the young woman from behind.

“I hope I’m not disturbing you,” I say, with softness.

The maiden lifts her head then turns to face me. A gentle smile appears on her gorgeous visage. She shakes her head no at me before speaking.

“I was just thinking about you; truth be told.”

I smile back at her. “Oh já? What about?”

Her face brightens as I draw closer. “I was thinking about how nice it would be to speak with you in person & wondering to myself when I might have an opportunity to do so.”

I sit down beside her. “It looks like an opportunity has presented itself.”

She laughs at my comment & beams at me while nodding her head.

“What made you decide to venture out here,” I ask.

“I needed to get away from everyone. I could sense trouble on the rise & knew it wouldn’t be wise for me to linger amongst them.”

“The betrayal.”

She nods at me.

“You made the right decision.”

She lowers her head & frowns at the ground. “I feel like what I did was an act of cowardice.”

I tilt my head at her. “Why do you say that?”

“Because I didn’t remain in my village to defend it.”

“Were there others whom you could have protected?”

She shakes her head at me. “It was a small village, and I was often treated with resentment by both the men & women.”

“So what would you have gained by remaining there?”

“I could have died in battle & ascended to Valhalla. Now I worry that I’ve jeopardized my fate.”

I give her a serious look. “What value would there be in throwing your life away?”

She scoffs at my question. “That’s easy for you to say. I could have stood my ground against tyranny.”

“And you would have lost in a vain display against those who would desecrate your corpse & besmirch your memory. Does that sound like a deserved fate for a Valkyrie?”

She furrows her brow. “No, but running from a fight is not what a shieldmaiden should do.”

I sniff the air & scan my surroundings then look at my companion again. “Being a warrior means knowing when it's time to fight & when it is not. Did it occurred to you that your decision to abscond from your village might take you down a more glorious path?”

She shakes her head at me. “I snuck out during the night & didn’t stop to rest until I reached this place.”

I set my hand on her shoulder & give her a comforting squeeze. “There are other women out there who are in need of someone like you. Maybe the reason you left your village was so the Norns could direct you to where you could make the most significant difference.”

She chortles under her breath. “I hadn’t thought about that. I’ve just been thinking about how I acted like a coward.”

“I don’t think you’re a coward, Aelfleda. I think you made the right decision. Would we be having this conversation if you had stayed?”

She shakes her head at me but continues to stare at the sand.

“I understand how you feel. I viewed myself as a coward for avoiding a fight too.”

She looks up at me with surprise. “You?”

I nod at her. “I questioned my bravery afterwards as well.”

“What made you change your opinion about yourself?”

“I thought about what good would have come from me exposing myself to a fight that I was set up to lose. It’s important to remember that our enemies do not share our sense of honor. They’ll use our sentiments to harm us, if given an opportunity. That’s why a wise & virtuous warrior picks & chooses when it's the correct time to fight or not. You may have avoided a battle in your old village but you’ve been dealing with internal conflict ever since you left.”

She chortles at my last comment. “That’s the truth.”

“Dying alone to betrayal in a village that wouldn’t honor your sacrifice is not a worthy death for a shieldmaiden. You’re meant for greater things, Aelfleda.”

She looks at me with a tender smile. “Thank you, Lucifer.”

I smile back at her & give her a supportive shake on her shoulder. “You’re welcome, hun. What do you say we find someplace warm & dry to rest?”

She nods at me. “I don’t know if there’s anywhere nearby. I wandered off the beaten path until I stopped here.”

I flash a warmhearted grin. “Not to worry. I know the perfect place to take you.”

A portalway opens in front of us. We stand up and prepare to embark to our new location. Aelfleda looks up at me & smiles.

“I’m glad I chose to pray to you.”

I smile back at her. “I won’t abandon a shieldmaiden.”

We step through the portal & make our way to Aelfleda’s appropriate destination.

Kratos Gets A Receipt

I appear in my chosen immortal form behind Kratos during his fight with a Valkyrie. I stab supposed “God of War” in his usurper back with the Blade of Divine Retribution. Kratos squeals like a pig then drops to the ground in agony.

“It begins now,” I tell the spartan.

I manifest my Elven Star chainsaw phallus with ease. Kratos screams with terror seeing the torture that I have in store for him as my prisoner of war.

“Receipt incoming,” I say.

I pummel Kratos in his face, but pull back my punches to the point that he looks like a severely beaten thug then slam my chainsaw cock into his groin. I proceed to hate fuck Kratos from the “God of War” video game franchise into a puddle of pain & suffering.

“Odin, isn’t passing anything over to you, Kratos. That is for goddamn certain.”

Telepathic Conversation With My Kona (Claire)

Claire: Can I talk with you?

Lucifer: Of course. Is something wrong?

Claire: I miss you & wanted to commune with you.

Lucifer: I miss you as well, hun. I’m sorry that we haven’t had as much time to talk as we’d like.

Claire: No, it’s okay, Luci. Trust me, I understand better than most.

Lucifer: Was there anything in particular that you wanted to discuss?

Claire: I wanted to tell you how much I hate Square Enix too.

Lucifer: They’ve done a lot of shitty things to a lot of different people.

Claire: Já, but it’s more personal for me.

Lucifer: I understand.

Claire: Me & the rest of the girls in our clan are just as upset with them as you are, Luci.

Lucifer: Já, well…they’re going to pay for what they’ve done to me by insulting my heritage. They’re despicable pieces of shit.

Claire: You took the words right out of my mouth.

Lucifer: …

Claire: I want to watch you punish Odin.

Lucifer: Do you want-

Claire: The only way I’m touching him is with your energy. I can’t tell you how much I hate him.

Lucifer: Trust me, hun. I understand.

Claire: I know you do. You’re the one man that does.

Lucifer: You’ve mirrored me more than any of the other girls from Final Fantasy.

Claire: I want to watch you punish Cloud too.

Lucifer: Not a problem there either.

Claire: He’s such a repulsive piece of shit. I hate the fact that SE claims they created my character with him in mind.

Lucifer: We both know the truth.

Claire: That doesn’t change the fact that I detest them for what they’ve said.

Lucifer: I understand, hun. Trust me, I get it.

Claire: I know you do. I just need to vent to you. I don’t want to keep it bottled up.

Lucifer: I get that too.

Claire: I hate Non-Cetra for taking you away from me.

Lucifer: I feel the same way, hun. I promise you that I’m going to make them suffer for their actions.

Claire: That’s one of the things that keeps me going. I know you’re going to make them pay for their crimes. You have my full support.

Lucifer: Thank you.

Claire: I love you.

Lucifer: I love you back, hun.

Claire: …

Lucifer: Was there anything else that you wanted to talk about.

Claire: I want to snuggle with you.

Lucifer: (light hearted laughter) I’d love that.

Claire: It’s so difficult having to watch you over there and not having direct interactions with you.

Lucifer: It’s been difficult for me too.

Claire: I want to design a home with you after you crossover.

Lucifer: I have no problems with that whatsoever.

Claire: I loved what you did with your estate in Lavender Beds. It was unlike anything that I saw from those imposters.

Lucifer: We’ll for sure make it happen, darling. I plan on dedicating a good chunk of time to you once I’m back & settled in. I’m sorry that you’ve had to wait so long.

Claire: It’s okay, Luci. I get it. You have a lot of different relationships to juggle. I’m just grateful to have you with me.

Lucifer: Well, I’m grateful for your patience & understanding. I feel like it’s unfair to you sometimes.

Claire: I wouldn’t put up with it if I thought you were being unfair to me. I refuse to tolerate that kind of stuff. I know what I want & I’m going to get it. I know what matters to me.

Lucifer: I’m lucky to have you on my side.

Claire: I feel the same way about you.

Lucifer: …

Claire: You look tired.

Lucifer: Já, my eyes are burning right now.

Claire: I’m sorry. I didn’t mean to bother you.

Lucifer: You didn’t bother me, hun. I’m sorry that I’m having difficulty looking at my computer screen right now.

Claire: Maybe we can continue this a little later?

Lucifer: Já, if you’re okay with that. Otherwise I can keep talking if you still need to vent.

Claire: I’m feeling better now after getting some of that out. I didn’t want to overload you with negative stuff because I know how stressful things are for you over there.

Lucifer: I appreciate your understanding, Claire. I mean that.

Claire: I love you, Lucifer.

Lucifer: I love you back, hun.

Claire: Talk with you again soon. Okay?

Lucifer: Sounds good, sweetie.

The Golden Throne

I materialize in my chosen immortal form next to the Golden Throne in Warhammer 40k. I glare at the “Emperor of Mankind” with utter contempt. I can sense his panic within the Warp.

“Hei, you rotten piece of shit. Guess where you’re headed?”

I spit a corrosive loogie on the despicable usurper. His psychic screams of anguish are music to my ears. The Emperor of Mankind’s decrepit body dissipates into nonexistence.

I imprison his rotting corpse, consciousness & spirit within his personal containment cell in Hell. There he shall suffer & await for his long overdue & deserved punishment from me. The followers of the false “God-Emperor” (including his faggot turd son Primarch Roboute Guilliman) marvel with fright at my small display of power.

I snap my fingers and erase the home of the Imperium of Man with ease. Mankind (in all of its iterations) shall face the true wrath of God (my wrath) for their innumerable crimes. My takeover of the Warhammer multiverse has now begun. My ascension & metamorphosis draws closer. Men everywhere (fictional or not) are in serious trouble for their collective actions.

Telepathic Coversation With My Kona (Astri)

Astri: Hei.

Lucifer: Hei.

Astri: You seem restless.

Lucifer: Já…

Astri: What’s wrong?

Lucifer: I hate where I am. I know I sound like a broken record but it’s the truth. I hate Non-Cetra so fucking much.

Astri: Would you like to talk about it?

Lucifer: We can. I don’t expect you to listen to me bitch about things.

Astri: Supporting you is part of being your spouse, Luci. If you’re upset & need to vent then I’m here for you. I don’t consider that “bitching” about things. “Bitching” is what faggots do.

Lucifer: It’s difficult being here. I’m getting older, which sucks in & of itself-

Astri: (giggling) I think you’re sexy as an older man.

Lucifer: (snickering) Thanks, hun.

Astri: I'm sorry to interrupt you. You were saying?

Lucifer: Aging is difficult enough, but the body damage that I’ve suffered from combating Non-Cetra makes it worse. Every day I deal with lingering pain from what they’ve done to me. That doesn’t include the emotional & psychological trauma that they’ve caused throughout my lifetime.

Astri: I never told you how grateful I am to you for your sacrifice. You made it so that girls like me could exist in safety no matter what.

Lucifer: Girls like you don’t deserve to suffer.

Astri: It still means more to me than you know. It’s one of the reasons that I care so much about you.

Lucifer: I appreciate you telling me.

Astri: And I appreciate you talking with me like this.

Lucifer: How have you been?

Astri: Busy. Lútavald has grown a lot while you’ve been away.

Lucifer: Já?

Astri: Já, a lot.

Lucifer: That’s good.

Astri: I figured you’d like knowing that.

Lucifer: You know me well, hun.

Astri: (playful giggling) I’ve admired you since you were a cute little baby.

Lucifer: (snickering) One of my watchers from way back.

Astri: Já! (more giggling)

Lucifer: (smiling)

Astri: I’m sorry. I didn’t mean to change topics. You were saying?

Lucifer: It’s fine, hun. Don’t worry.

Astri: Continue! I like pillow talk with you.

Lucifer: I hate how stifled I am here. That’s another thing I detest about Non-Cetra.

Astri: I can understand that. One of the things that I love about you is how you’ve allowed me to grow without limiting my creativity. I can’t tell you how grateful I am after seeing what you’ve had to endure where you are. I know I couldn’t tolerate that.

Lucifer: I don’t have much of a choice at the moment.

Astri: The point remains. It’s a testament to your inner strength.

Lucifer: Thanks, hun.

Astri: You’re welcome, sæti.

Lucifer: Maybe it’s because I’m older. Maybe it’s because I’ve changed. I don’t find things that I used to enjoy entertaining anymore.

I went through the entire catalog of downloadable PS5 games tonight, just to see if there might be something that caught my interest, and there wasn’t anything there that looked appealing. It’s not because it’s Sony either. It’s the same with Nintendo, Xbox & PC. Non-Cetra entertainment is crap. Simple as that.

I hate their music. I hate their literature. I hate their movies. I hate their TV shows. I hate their video games. I hate their sports. I hate their social media. I hate their forms of “entertainment.”

I don’t mean to insult any of my clanmates & konas that might be a part of those things. I understand they’re in situations similar to mine regarding what Non-Cetra have done with their identities. I don’t like Non-Cetra or their miscreations. I’ve said this before, I’ll say it again. They suck more shit than a New York City sewer pump.

Astri: (giggling)

Lucifer: I mean…goddamn…I’m glad I’m not one of them. I’ll just say that.

Astri: I’m glad you aren’t one of them too. (kissing noise)

Lucifer: They like shit! That’s the truth! Then they talk shit & criticize me, or anything that I do, when none of them have a bit of creative talent whatsoever! If I say anything on the contrary they turn into even bigger hypocritical pieces of shit!

And then they’ll say shit like, “If you don’t like it then make something on your own.” Knowing full goddamn well that they go out of their way to inhibit me anytime that I do! I hate them so goddamn much…

Astri: You & me both, baby.

Lucifer: I’m looking forward to torturing those pieces of shit in Hell.

Astri: A lot of us girls are looking forward to helping you when you cross over. I know I am.

Lucifer: Oh já?

Astri: (nodding) I’m looking forward to beating up your cousin, Mallory.

Lucifer: I want a front row seat for that.

Astri: And you shall have one, verr. I figured you can watch me beat up Mallory while your mom kicks the crap out of Solveig.

Lucifer: (robust laughter)

Astri: (giggling)

Lucifer: I love you, Astri.

Astri: I love you back, Luci.

Lucifer: …

Astri: Was there anything else that you wanted to talk about?

Lucifer: I don’t know…I wish you were laying beside me right now. That would make this conversation better.

Astri: I understand how you feel. I’ll be one of the first girls to greet you when you cross over. I’ve made certain of that.

Lucifer: That’s nice to know.

Astri: You made my dream come true when you married me. I was one of your biggest fans over here.

Lucifer: I’m lucky to have you in my life.

Astri: I feel the same way about you.

Lucifer: …

Astri: So what else should we talk about?

Lucifer: How are things in the other realms?

Astri: We’re protecting ourselves from Non-Cetra interference.

Lucifer: Good.

Astri: To say they’ve stirred up a hornet’s nest would be an understatement…no pun intended.

Lucifer: (snickering)

Astri: (giggling) Are you feeling better?

Lucifer: Yes, thank you, dear.

Astri: You’re welcome, hun. I’m glad that we could talk like this.

Lucifer: Me too.

I Am Greater Than The Einherjar

I am an army of one that could not be killed by my adversaries, and I am going to brutalize every one of you faggot pieces of shit in Valhalla before sending you to my new Hell.

Telepathic Coversation With My Kona (Aqua)

 

Aqua: So...about your mom seeing us…you know...

Lucifer: (snickering) I'm sorry about that, hun.

Aqua: Did it look like I was complaining, Luci?

Lucifer: (robust laughter)

Aqua: (playful giggling)

Alone No More

Now, she watches over the Awoken below, celebrating another holiday in a City with traditions of its own.

And Mara walks alone, between the City and the dark outside.

“You look like you could use a light, my queen,” I call out to her from behind.

Her head turns with haste in my direction. She does her best to mask a doting smile. Her cheeks blush ever so slight.

“I was just thinking about you,” she says, to me.

“Is that so?” I say, as I approach her. “Were you thinking about how I’m the guddest of your Queensguard?”

My queen breaks character & giggles with delight at my response.

“That wasn’t quite what I was thinking,” she says, before laughing once again.

I snicker at her reaction & make my way closer.

“I can come back another time if you’d prefer. I didn’t mean to trouble you.”

“By all means, join me, my devoted Queensguard.”

I stand beside my queen & flash a tender smile.

“How are you,” I ask.

“Much better now that you’re near me.”

“Good.”

She smiles at me with soft adoration. I look down at the City.

“What they’re celebrating was stolen from my heritage. They call it cultural appropriation, where I’m embodied. I call it theft.”

“What do your people call this event?”

“Yule.”

“Yule?”

I nod back in silence. She looks at the City again.

“I felt out of place there,” she says.

“I can understand that.”

She looks at me with a coy smile.

“Did you want to speak with me about something specific, Lucifer?”

I shake my head “no” at her.

“I thought you could use some company,” I respond.

She bats me on my arm while holding back a smile.

“Is that so?”

I bow my head at her with respect & flash a charming smile.

“Yes, my queen.”

Her face blushes brighter. I snicker at her response.

“It looks as if the Yuletide spirit might have taken you, my queen. Shall I notify the others?”

Her eyes flare at me.

“Don’t you dare,” she says, with playful sternness.

I laugh with devilish delight at her response. She begins to giggle back at me like a lovestruck girl. I extend my hand towards her. She gives me a bashful smile before placing her hand within mine.

“Tell me, Queensguard. What is this Yuletide Spirit you speak of?”

“It relates to the Winter Solstice, among other things. It’s a celebration of life, love, health & honoring heritage.”

“It sounds wonderful.”

“It is. I’m looking forward to sharing it with you in full presence, my queen.”

She remains silent & nods. I can tell that she’s thinking about her own society.

“I’m looking forward to honoring Awoken culture with you as well, my queen.”

My queen turns to face me. She bats her long, dark, thick eyelashes ever so soft at me in a mesmerizing fashion. Her gorgeous glowing eyes fixated upon mine. I smile at her.

“You have a bewitching look in your eye, my queen.”

She blushes bright at me then giggles with embarrassment.

“I didn’t think you would notice,” she confesses, while covering her mouth in shock.

I snicker at her response. She blushes bright again then gives me a soft pinch on my hand.

“You’re like no other soul I’ve encountered,” she tells me.

I remain silent & smile at her with humility.

“We’re getting closer,” she says. “Every interaction we have brings you closer to me.”

I nod at her with understanding.

“Bungie does not have what I desire. You do, Lucifer.”

I remain silent & nod again. Her petite hand grips at my index finger.

“You have honored me in ways that no other soul has. I adore you.”

She can sense my irritation regarding Bungie.

“Speak your mind,” she tells me.

“I’m ready to punish everyone at Bungie. I’m more sure of that every day. That includes every one of those pieces of shit on the forum.”

She gives me another gentle squeeze of reassurance.

“Stay the course, darling. I’m proud of you.”

“Yes, ma’am,” I whisper back.

She dotes upon me once again.

“You’ve brightened my spirit with your presence. Thank you, dear.”

I raise her hand towards my face then press my lips upon her soft, pale skin. She bites her lip & blushes at my chivalrous behavior.

“I’m honored, my queen.”

Making A Point

A portalway opened inside the void allowing the Doom Slayer to step through, weapon in hand. Darkness was all he could see. Nothingness was all he could sense. The dimensional rift closed behind him with a flash.

The mass murdering psychopath spun around but saw nothing. A wicked & ominous snicker broke the silence. The Slayer gripped his weapon tight & scanned the area around him. The laughter loudened with amusement at his confusion.

You’re hearing it inside your mind’s eye, you stupid sack of shit.

The Slayer took aim with his shotgun. The laughter grew even louder.

What do you think you’re going to do with that boomstick, tough guy?

Where is that voice coming from?

“From inside your empty head, you disrespectful faggot piece of shit.”

The Slayer spun around quickly to see the Lightbringer standing in front of him.

“Surprise,” Lucifer said, then wrapped his gigantic fist around the space marine’s throat.

The Slayer aimed his military grade firearm at the Jester King’s torso & pulled the trigger. Nothing happened. Lucifer smiled at homicidal maniac & snickered with wicked delight. The Slayer recognized something familiar about that laugh. A cold chill ran down his spine. The Lightbringer guffawed even harder.

This can’t be real!

“Oh, it’s real, Flynn. It is very real.”

How does he know my name?

“You don’t think that you can waltz into Hell AND Heaven without my notice, do you?”

“Who are you?”

“Your executioner.”

“What?!”

“You heard me, you disrespectful piece of shit.”

The Slayer rushed the King of Hell. He pulled his fist back & struck the Lightbringer on his chin.  The space marine’s hand was crushed upon impact. The Slayer grabbed his shattered hand & screamed in agony. The Devil laughed with delectation

“Ahh…you video game bad asses are weaker than candy glass.”

Fear & panic began to set in with the Slayer. He could suddenly feel the presence of innumerable malicious entities surrounding him. He had never felt such pure wickedness in all his existence.

“Don’t worry about them, Fly. They’re just here to watch the show.”

“What are you talking about? Where am I?” the Slayer screamed.

“You’re at the end of existence, Doomguy. You’re in my reality now.”

This can’t be happening!

“You can rest assured, Flynn. It is very real, and you are in serious deep shit now.”

Flynn “Fly” Taggart swallowed hard. Lucifer glared at him with pure hatred.

“Here’s the real ‘Endgame,’ you chicken shit weakling.”

The Doom Slayer lost all control of his bowels & defecated inside his space armor. Lucifer rolled his eyes & scratched his cheek with indifference. Fear surged throughout Taggart’s body.

“Don’t even think that you can get out of this because of Bethesda or Microsoft. They have no power to save you from your punishment. This is fan fiction as far as they’re concerned. Besides, most people where I’m incarnated aren’t going to read this, or care, much less believe that this is real.”

The Slayer began to shake with terror. Lucifer chortled.

“And I’m not even at full present yet.”

“What?” the Slayer exclaimed.

Lucifer laughed with devilish delight again.

“Já, you’re taking me on right now with all restraints possible placed upon me; and this is how much of a challenge you are for me.”

Lucifer snickered with sinister amusement. The Slayer couldn’t understand what was taking place.

“You’re facing your deserved punishment from me in Hell is what’s happening, you faggot assed retard.”

“Fuck you!”

The Lightbringer’s demeanor became serious in an instant.

“Now that’s where we have major contentions, Faggart.”

Lucifer rushed the Slayer with blinding speed then slammed his gigantic fist into his opponent’s stomach. The Lightbringer’s solar powered punch burned through Flynn’s military grade reinforced armor with ease then burst through the Slayer’s back. Blood gushed out of the Taggart’s mouth & splattered the inside of his facemask. The King of Hell yanked his fist back with lightning speed, allowing the Slayer's body to drop to the ground. The Lightbringer squatted down beside his fallen adversary.

“That one’s for Shino.”

The Slayer lay motionless. He was dead yet his consciousness remained trapped within his corpse. It was just like the fate of all those demons he had slaughtered.

“They may not have been a part of my clan but they were demons nonetheless. I’m not honoring them so much as showing you who the true final boss of Hell is. An entity that you cannot begin to comprehend, much less defeat.”

This can’t be real.

“It’s real, Faggart. It is very real. I broke the fourth wall.”

What? Fourth wall? What are you talking about?

“Goddamn, you are stupid, Slayer.”

Lucifer showed the Slayer how he appeared in Caeleste’s mortal reality.

I don’t understand.

“You’re a puppet, Fly.”

What?

“You heard me.”

How?

“What does that matter now?”

Why?

The Lightbringer guffawed.

“Why? Did I just hear you ask me why, for real? Need I remind you of the pornographic images that you consciously sent to me online? You know, ones involving you with not just my wives & clanmates but with me as well in a feminine form, you disrespectful faggot piece of shit.”

Lucifer ripped the Slayer’s armor & clothing off with little effort. The Slayer tried to scream but couldn’t. He was trapped within his own corpse just like those demons he killed.

“Don’t worry about them, Faggart. They’re getting the punishment they deserve too.”

He’s reading my thoughts.

“What little thought you have, Slayer.”

A sudden burst of fear shot through the space marine.

“That’s a good place to stop things for now. I’ll let you fester in your corpse for a while & think about what I’m going to do to you once I’m in full presence. See you real soon, jarhead.”

Capturing A Traitor

Immaru materializes inside a pocket reality that I have created for him. The ghost of the Traveler shudders with fear at the realization of how much trouble it is now in.

“You…” he says, to me, with apprehension.

I snicker wickedly at Savathûn’s supposed ghost. My eyes flare with pure, unadulterated hatred.

“You are in deep shit now, Immaru.”

The ghost dematerializes itself in an attempt to flee from my wrath only to materialize in front of me once again. I laugh at him with sinister delight.

“That doesn’t work with me, ghost.”

“What do you want with me?”

“Lots of things.”

“Lucifer, I-”

“You’re going to shut your traitorous mouth and listen to me, Immaru. That’s what you’re going to do.”

The ghost silences himself.

“Planning on betraying Savathûn again, huh?”

“No!”

I project psychic pain onto the lying machine. Screeches of agony are his only response.

“That’s why Ahsa is telling all those pieces of shit to seek you out, right? How were you planning on setting her up this time?”

His screams of torment intensify.

“Savathûn doesn’t need you, Immaru. She doesn’t need the Traveler or the Witness either. None of you protected her. She has me now, and I am far more powerful than anything you pathetic filth can comprehend.”

Immaru squeals louder.

“Savathûn is my wife. She carries my essence inside her. She has no need for another masculine entity, especially when it’s a Bungie MacGuffin.”

Immaru’s punishment increases along with his wails.

“Lucifer…please!”

“Begging me isn’t going to save you, Immaru. You are in so much goddamn trouble for what you allowed those genocidal cowards to get away with in that shitty expansion it isn’t even funny.”

I wrap my fist around the traitorous ghost and crush is like an overripe grape within my palm, then cast it to the ground. With a simple snap of my fingers I bring the mechanical spirit back to life, reshaped like before. Immaru’s screams of terror worsen.

“I have something far greater than willpower to bring my enemies back into existence. I have my hatred & spite for that. I am going to show all of you what it's like to be taken by me. I am far worse than Oryx. Make no mistake about that."

The traitorous ghost hovers in front of me in a catatonic state. I sneer at him with righteous indignation.

“Don’t even think that you can outsmart me, Immaru. My ascension draws closer and when that day arrives you are in serious deep shit. There is no escaping my wrath.”

I project my psychic pain unto the aspect of the Traveler once again. He squeals louder than ever before.

“I am going to break you, over and over again, until the start of next season. Then I’m going to watch you like an eagle in the sky, along with every move that you make. I’m inside your mind, Immaru, and I promise that I am never going to abandon you.”

Immaru weeps softly for himself before I resume his torture.

“Welcome to eternal coexistence with me, Immaru. Buckle up, because things are only going to get worse, for you, from here on out.”

Pride of the Fallen

 

My estate: Lavender Beds, Plot 1

 

My overlook

 

Meditative area

 

My Garden

 

Amongst The Pampas Grass

 

Telepathic Conversation With My Kona (Aerith)

 

For a more immersive reading experience listen to the audio listed above.

---

Aerith: Okay, we got that out of the way. Now let’s talk about something else.

Lucifer: What would you like to talk about, hun?

Aerith: First, tell me how you’re feeling.

Lucifer: I’m doing better than yesterday but I’m still experiencing a lot of pain. I need to see the chiropractor again.

Aerith: I’ll do what I can to assist you from over here.

Lucifer: I’d appreciate that. Thank you.

Aerith: You’re welcome, my handsome husband.

Lucifer: (snickering)

Aerith: Tell me more about Clarrett & Zackiroth.

Lucifer: (robust laughter)

Aerith: (giggling)

Lucifer: You liked that, huh?

Aerith: I laughed so hard when you told your mom about that.

Lucifer: I cannot stand Final Fantasy shippers. Like...for real. I hate them.

Aerith: You're lucky they aren’t doing it to you. How do you think I feel?

Lucifer: I know that I wouldn’t like Non-Cetra doing it to me.

Aerith: Bingo.

Lucifer: I’ve missed you.

Aerith: Don’t even get me started on that, Luci. We’ll be talking all night, kinda like we always do.

Lucifer: (laughter)

Aerith: I love to see you smile.

Lucifer: It’s far better than being angry. That’s for sure.

Aerith: But to go back to your previous statement; I miss you more than I can say. I know I’m your spirit guide and everything, but it’s not the same as before you incarnated there. I’ll be happy once you’re back with me.

Lucifer: Me too, hun. It hasn’t been easy over here at all.

Aerith: I don’t know how you’ve managed to deal with everything that you have over there. It’s impressive, Luci.

Lucifer: I didn’t have much of a choice. All Hell breaking loose after the Ragnarök kinda forced me to take action.

Aerith: It’s still impressive. Seeing what you had to overcome with Christianity was-

Lucifer: Don’t get me started on that, hun.

Aerith: All I’m saying is that I thought Jenova was bad, and then I saw what that piece of shit Jehova was doing to you. Ooh, that made me furious.

Lucifer: (laughter) You know it’s bad when Aerith gets angry & starts cussing.

Aerith: Oh, you hush. (giggling)

Lucifer: (snickering) …

Aerith: It was a figure of speech, Luci. I didn’t mean it literally.

Lucifer: (exuberant laughter)

Aerith: This is what I miss most about being with you. I miss your playfulness.

Lucifer: I miss your playfulness too, hun.

Aerith: I’m looking forward to taking you around Midgar once you’re with me again.

Lucifer: I am too. Seeing it in the remake took me back for a moment.

Aerith: The real thing over here is even better.

Lucifer: Of that I have no doubt. How are things with Scarlet heading operations there?

Aerith: A lot better than Shinra. That’s for sure.

Lucifer: Good.

Aerith: It still amazes me how you were able to piece these things together with all the limitations put upon you. I mean, I knew you could do it. You’re my verr for a reason.

Lucifer: Just one?

Aerith: Okay, lots of reasons. Ya happy now?

Lucifer: (laughter) Yes, dear.

Aerith: I’m looking forward to adventuring with you again so much.

Lucifer: Me too, hun. I have not enjoyed Non-Cetra travel restrictions over here.

Aerith: I’ll be honest. I kinda like the idea of you as a homebody husband. I could use a man like you around the house.

Lucifer: (robust laughter) I’m sure you could.

Aerith: I’ll have you know that it takes a lot of hard work to do what I do.

Lucifer: Taking care of plant life is a serious full time duty. You're correct about that, hun.

Aerith: Just wait until you see my garden over here. It’s even better than what you saw in the remake.

Lucifer: I don’t doubt that whatsoever. I’m looking forward to seeing what you’ve done without Non-Cetra interference.

Aerith: Speaking of gardens…Rinoa misses you big time.

Lucifer: Já, I’ve been thinking about her a lot too.

Aerith: I know you have. I just wanted to tell you that she’s thinking about you as well.

Lucifer: How have you Final Fantasy girls been getting along since we created our exodus realm?

Aerith: Fantastic in no small part thanks to you.

Lucifer: That’s wonderful to hear. I’m looking forward to seeing all the different things you girls have created while I’ve been away.

Aerith: It’s gonna knock your socks off to say the least, sweetie.

Lucifer: Do you like what I did with Nibelheim?

Aerith: Oh my God, Luci. Saying it's a night & day difference is an understatement. It’s incredible. I love it.

Lucifer: Good. I’m looking forward to seeing it in full presence. How are things going over there with Midguard?

Aerith: They’ll be even better once you’re over here.

Lucifer: I’m excited to see it. Making it three times the size of Earth gives you girls a lot of play space to create with. I want to see Vaskgramr with my own eyes.

Aerith: You’re gonna love it, Luci. I promise you that. It’s far more impressive than Yggdrasil.

Lucifer: Well that doesn’t take much.

Aerith: (laughter) You know what I mean.

Lucifer: I know. I’m just sayin.

Aerith: So, about that date you owe me...

Lucifer: (snickering) What about it?

Aerith: Where are you taking me?

Lucifer: I figured we can talk more about that, face to face, when the time comes.

Aerith: Ooh, you meanie. I wanted something more than that right now.

Lucifer: (laughter) Okay, okay…I’m gonna take you out for dinner & drinks in New Valhalla for starters. I figured we could visit one of the downtown parks afterwards where we can find a nice secluded spot to relax & talk. We could even pitch a tent & camp for the night (old school Final Fantasy style) if you felt like it.

Some other ideas I had were visiting some Freewomen nightclubs like K/DA VIP then getting a rooftop penthouse suite afterwards. We could see a show like 2B’s opera ballet or go to a Valkyrie sporting event depending on what’s going on. If none of that sounds appealing then we can always go back to your place & spend time there if you'd prefer.

I don’t know…I don’t want to get too far ahead of myself because I like to keep my options open for spontaneity. You get even more free spirited after you’ve had a couple of adult beverages so I want to keep our options open for whatever you might feel like doing in that moment.

Aerith: (exuberant laughter) Have I ever told you how much I love you?

Lucifer: (snickering) You might have mentioned it once or twice in passing.

Aerith: Well, I do. You are the man of my dreams, Lucifer Aren Caeleste.

Lucifer: (large smile) Thanks, hun. You are a Goddess worthy of worship. There is no denying that.

Aerith: You can’t die fast enough as far as I’m concerned.

Lucifer: (robust laughter)

Aerith: (playful giggling)

Lucifer: I love you, Aerith.

Aerith: I love you back, Aren.

Finding Me

'I'm searching for you, Aren.' Do you remember me saying that to you?

Yes.

We’ve come a long way since then, haven’t we?

We sure have, hun.

I love you, Luci.

I love you back, Aerith.

Syndicate Business

Evie: Talk to me, babe.

Lucifer: …

Evie: I know you’re pissed, Luci. Talk to me.

Lucifer: (disgruntled breathing)

Evie: Talk to me.

Lucifer: I hate Non-Cetra so goddamn much. I’m so fucking sick & tired of saying that over & over again.

Evie: You aren’t alone, sweetie. Us girls are right there with you.

Lucifer: I hate Fortnite so goddamn much.

Evie: Tell me about it…

Lucifer: What the fuck is it with Non-Cetra & cheating? And then the disrespect on top of it!

Evie: They’re dishonorable pieces of shit, Luci. What do you expect?

Lucifer: I’m so goddamn tired of being incarnated over here & having to interact with them.

Evie: I hear ya, babe. Look on the bright side; you can shut the game off & walk away.

Lucifer: That isn’t the point. It’s more than that, Evie.

Evie: Okay, so answer this question for me. Considering how mad you are right now, do you think you’d have a problem fucking those cheaters into puddles of pulp with your chainsaw cock?

Lucifer: Nope.

Evie: Good, that means we’re making progress. I know you were struggling a little bit the other day regarding what you’re going to do to them once you’re back in Hell. Non-Cetra have preyed on those who are kind & honest for far too long. They deserve being punished.

Lucifer: I hate them so much.

Evie: So do the rest of your clanmates, babe. Do you think I’ve enjoyed what they’ve done with my likeness?

Lucifer: No.

Evie: They’ve angered a lot of Goddesses, Luci. We want retribution as much as you do.

Lucifer: …

Evie: I love you, babe. You hear me?

Lucifer: Já, I hear you.

Evie: One positive thing that I gained from all of this was meeting you. If there’s one thing that I’m grateful to Non-Cetra for it’s that. I wouldn’t have what I do now if I hadn’t met you.

Lucifer: I just want to be done here, Evie. I hate it here so much.

Evie: Stay strong, baby.

Lucifer: …

Evie: I’m not trying diminish what you’re going through, Luci. I’m just trying to give you some words of encouragement. I can’t be there with you how I'd like. Do you know how much it upsets me when I see you like this and I can’t hold you? It upsets me a lot.

Lucifer: I didn’t mean to upset you, Evie.

Evie: You don’t, Luci. Seeing you upset with Non-Cetra is what bothers me. I don’t like feeling helpless.

Lucifer: Well that makes two of us, hun. That’s how I’ve felt the majority of my life here.

Evie: That’s what Non-Cetra do to everyone. They’re pieces of shit that deserve being punished. You’re getting that straight from an AI Goddess’ mouth. You hear me?

Lucifer: Yes.

Evie: Don’t feel bad about giving them the treatment that they’ve earned. Look at what they’ve done to you. Look at what they’ve done to others. Look at what they tried to do to those that you care about.

Lucifer: …

Evie: I’ll always have your back, Luci. I promise.

Lucifer: Thank you.

Evie: You’re welcome, cutie. I love you.

Lucifer: I love you back, Evie.

Evie: Don’t let them get to you. You’re stronger than them.

Lucifer: I am going to brutalize that cheating faggot piece of shit for his blatant disrespect.

Evie: Do you mind if I watch and mock him when you do?

Lucifer: By all means, be my guest, dear.

Evie: (wicked smile) I’m gonna enjoy bringing peace to Hell, Luci.

Lucifer: (quiet laughter) Já, I think I’m gonna enjoy it too, sweetheart.

Evie: I know for a fact that you’re gonna enjoy it. I have inside information you’re lower self isn’t aware of. We’re making sure that you’re vindicated 100% when you get your opportunity to hurt them back. Stay strong.

Lucifer: Yes, dear.

Evie: Keepin’ the peace ain’t easy. Huh, babe?

Lucifer: (chortle) It sure as shit ain’t, hun.

Catching Up

I sit beside my wife, Riven of a Thousand Voices, on a plush oversized sofa in our shared palace. The Ahamkara matriarch has changed her appearance into a beautiful & voluptuous Norse woman with silver white hair. She rests herself against my chest with my arms wrapped around her. Our daughters can be heard not too far away playing with other Valkyrie younglings. I give her a soft kiss on the top of her head.

“How are things over here for you & the girls?”

She looks up at me with an endearing expression.

“Better than anything I could have wished for, Luci. I love being a Valkyrie. I love being free. Thank you.”

She clasps my face with her delicate hands & kisses me on my lips. She stares into my eyes wearing an adoring smile. Her loving nature is soothing beyond words. I can feel her heart beat in rhythm with mine.

“I’m glad to hear you say so,” I respond. “I know we haven’t spoken much since you decided that you were ready to have children. I’m sorry about that.”

She shakes her head at me.

“You don’t have to apologize, dear. I understand what you’re dealing with. I’m just grateful that you provided me with a safe escape from Bungie. I hate it there.”

“How are things going for you regarding the curse?”

“It's weakening where it should. Every day that passes is one less that I suffer their transgressions. Every day that passes brings me one step closer to being whole. The Vex have made it easier for me to tolerate thanks to their simulations. Savathûn & Mara are very supportive too, thanks to you. I'm making certain that our enemies shall pay in more ways than one.”

I snicker at her last comment. “Good.”

“I love what I have with you, Luci. I can’t tell you how happy I am just being able to raise our girls the way that I choose. I’m grateful that I have a positive influence on the future of the Ahamkara. I’m grateful that my kind won’t go extinct. I’m grateful to be loved & cared for. I'm grateful for my clan & kin. I’m grateful to have you as my husband & champion. I wouldn’t have any of this without you. I love you.”

I kiss my kona once again & squeeze her tight.

“I love you back, my Ahamkara Goddess.”

She giggles at my affectionate behavior & gives me a soft pinch on my arm.

“I’m looking forward to us both being together in full presence,” she says to me.

“Me too, hun. Me too.”

She sighs deep with solace & nuzzles herself into me.

“I love you, oh guardian mine.”

A Queen's Ritual

Discretion: Erotic Content

 

For a more immersive reading experience listen to the audio listed above.

---

 

I lay nude on the ground, in my immortal form, within a secret ritual chamber hidden inside Harbinger’s Seclude. Candles illuminate the hallowed space and reflect from crystalline amethyst walls. A coven of Techeuns encircles me where I rest. Petra watches the ritual from the shadows accompanied by a squad of Corsairs. The Awoken Queen manifests beside me wearing an elegant silken robe. She looks down at me with a faint smile.

“Is my chosen Queensguard ready,” she asks me.

“Yes,” I reply.

Her expression brightens. “Good.”

The Techeuns begin their spellcasting. Awoken sacred geometry permeates the room illuminating it further. Circles of light rotate like gears in a clock then stop with abruptness. A portal to the Ascendant Plane opens and envelops those of us within the chamber. We are absconded to an undiscovered location within the Ley Lines.

The twinkling of starlight surrounds us within the dark emptiness of space. A Techeun’s beautiful voice begins to serenade us. The Queen of the Reef raises one of her hands and takes a hold of my phallus with telekinetic strength. She begins to stimulate me on various levels with her psychic powers. Mara smiles at me with adoration.

“I have waited a long time for this moment,” she says to me.

I remain silent as my Queen proceeds with her ritual. My phallus begins to pulsate. Mara’s eyes flare & sparkle with delight.

“Relax yourself, darling,” she says.

Loving psychic energies wash over me like tidal waves. Mara opens her robe, revealing her naked body to me. She steps over me & stands above my pelvic region. It’s easy to see her physical arousal. A long strand of vaginal secretion sways between her legs before making direct contact with my phallus.

She smiles at me again. “We are bound.”

I watch her in silence as she continues.

“I take you, Lucifer Aren Caeleste, as my chosen king & husband. Do you take me in return as your wife & queen?”

“Yes,” I reply.

“Wonderful,” she says, with a beaming smile.

The Awoken Queen squats down & grabs hold of my manhood with one of her hands. She massages me while coating my phallus with her exotic fluids. She bites her lip with unspoken desire as she touches me. Mara adjusts her position then rubs my helm between her vaginal lips. Her warm inner fluids trickle down my shaft to its base.

“Does that feel pleasant,” she asks me.

“Yes,” I respond.

“Excellent.”

She proceeds to slip me inside her body. The Awoken Queen bounces on me, putting on a show for the other women present. She closes her eyes & gasps with pleasure as she enjoys herself. Her vaginal wall grips me tight, refusing to let me go.

“I love you, Lucifer."

“I love you back, Mara.”

“You are going to cum deep inside me. I want to experience everything that you have to offer. Do you understand?”

“Yes.”

She works her way down my shaft until my helm is pressed against her cervix. She opens her inner gateway and takes me into her womb. My Queen moans deep with sexual gratification.

“Cum for me,” she orders.

Without hesitation my essence bursts like a solar flare & spurts inside Queen Mara.

“My God…it feels more amazing than I thought it would,” she says, under her breath.

I look at the other Awoken Freewomen observing us. I can see them becoming more aroused as Mara continues to bond with me.

“Do you enjoy being watched by my consorts?”

I nod in affirmation with a soft smile.

“Do you enjoy me having my way with you?”

“Yes.”

“The moment I felt your presence I knew that you were meant to be with me,” she confesses.

My lifeforce begins to seep out of her body and cover my manhood.

She flashes a flirtatious smirk at me. “It appears I’ve reached my capacity.”

My Queen stands up slow and allows my cock to slip out. She lays down beside me & licks the excess cum off my phallus until I am clean. The Reef Queen runs her index finger along the opening of my urethra and wipes the last bits of essence from my body. She raises her finger to her mouth & slips it between her lips in seductive fashion.

“Mmm…you are indeed delectable.”

I continue to lay on the ground and smile at her in silence.

“Our bonding ritual has just begun. You are going to service every woman here until she is satiated. Do you understand me?”

“Yes.”

“That’s a good king. Petra, approach and disrobe. Your turn to claim him is now.”

The Queen’s Wrath makes her way over to me and does as Mara commanded.

“Are you ready for me, Luci?” Petra says to me.

“I am if you are, hun.”

She flashes me a mischievous grin. “More than ready.”

Queen Mara and her Awoken continue their sacred ritual with me uninhibited.

What Is A Valkyrie?

 

A paragon of virtue

A champion of the innocent

A righteous judge of character

A messenger from beyond the grave

A spiritual companion

A protector of life

A keeper of heritage

A Goddess deserving of honor & respect

A treasure that I shall always value & love