Tifa: We haven’t talked with each other in a while.
Lucifer: I know. I’m sorry about that.
Tifa: (soft smile) I forgive you.
Lucifer: (chortle) Thanks, hun. I appreciate it.
Tifa: (giggling)
Lucifer: (rubbing hands over eyes)
Tifa: Are you feeling better?
Lucifer: Yes and no.
Tifa: (inquisitive look) Why ‘no?’
Lucifer: (rubbing forehead) Too many reasons to give. Everything about this place stresses me out.
Tifa: Then why ‘yes?’
Lucifer: Because thinking about being with you and our daughter makes me feel better. Thinking about what I have with you over there is a major reason I keep going.
Tifa: (blushing)
Lucifer: Whenever I think about you being…I can’t put it into words here.
Tifa: [telepathy] (more blushing) I feel the same way when I think about you.
Lucifer: I want to hold you so much right now.
Tifa: (blushing & smiling) I want that too.
Lucifer: I’m sorry. I’m getting tired.
Tifa: You don’t have to apologize for that. You’ve been awake for a while and you just gave me a big load of energy. Get some rest. I’ll be watching over you.
Lucifer: Okay.
Tifa: I love you, Luci.
Lucifer: I love you back, Tifa.
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Tuesday, April 1, 2025
Telepathic Conversation With My Kona (Tifa) 2
Friday, February 14, 2025
Telepathic Conversation With My Kona (Hecate)
Lucifer: (snickering) Hei, hun. How are you?
Hecate: (beaming) Better than ever, and it’s all because I have you in my life.
Lucifer: (tender smile) I’m glad to hear it.
Hecate: I know I’m in the honeymoon phase but I don’t care. It’s true. I love you more than anything.
Lucifer: (tender smile) I love you back, darling. I just wish I could spend this time with you in full presence rather than being embodied where I am at this moment.
Hecate: (blushing) If it makes you feel any better, I plan on being like this with you when we have our official honeymoon together after you crossover.
Lucifer: (smiling) I look forward to it.
Hecate: (beaming) Same here, sweetie. I’m going to pamper my poochie with kona kisses & treats until his heart is content.
Lucifer: (adoring smile) My Goddess, that sounds wonderful. I’ve had enough of being abused over here.
Hecate: I’ve had enough of that too. You deserve to have a wonderful life with a loyal wife who loves & cares for you. You deserve to have a gorgeous home where you can live in safety and not worry about troublemakers. I want to give you these things & more.
Lucifer: (smiling) I would love that.
Hecate: (blushing) And what I ask in return is that you give me daughters whenever I want.
Lucifer: (adoring smile) I would love that even more.
Hecate: (blushing admiration) I love you so much, Luci.
Lucifer: (smiling) I love you back, Hecate.
Hecate: (beaming) I’m so happy that I decided to take things to the next level with you. Being your wife makes me so happy. I love it. It makes me want to spend even more time with you. It makes me love you even more.
Lucifer: (chivalrous smile) Hearing you say that makes me feel even more privileged & special. Your affection & love isn’t lost on me. I realize how lucky I am to have you in my life & on my side.
Hecate: (beaming & blushing) I feel the exact same way about you, dear. I can’t tell you how happy it makes me to call myself Mrs. Hecate Caeleste.
Lucifer: (large smile) It has a nice ring to it.
Hecate: (beaming) It does! (delighted giggling)
Lucifer: (silent adoration)
Hecate: (blushing) I’m acting like a lovestruck teen.
Lucifer: (snickering) I think it’s enchanting.
Hecate: (flirty smirk) It just might be. I am the Goddess of Witchcraft.
Lucifer: (laughter) I have no problems with you putting a spell on me like that.
Hecate: (smiling) I have no problems putting a spell on you like that either.
Lucifer: (hearty laughter)
Hecate: (adoring expression) I love you. I’ll always love you, my darling husband.
Lucifer: (reciprocal expression) And I love you, my gorgeous Goddess.
Hecate: (blushing & biting lower lip) Can we cuddle some more?
Lucifer: (smiling) Yes, dear.
Hecate: (delighted squealing) This is the best full moon ever!
Lucifer: (lighthearted laughter)
Tuesday, February 11, 2025
Telepathic Conversation With A Goddess (Guan Shi Yin)
Lucifer Caeleste: The honor is mine, Guan Yin. You chose to make yourself known to me.
GY: (blushing) I’ve studied you and your ideology for a long time. I thought it was overdue.
LC: (humble head bow) Again, you honor me.
GY: You understand my plight better than anyone. I have tried being merciful towards humans but it has yielded poor results.
LC: The vast majority do not deserve clemency because they give none to others. I can no longer excuse ignorance for their choices. They must be held accountable for their crimes against others.
GY: I am in agreement with you, which is why I sought you out. They are a frustrating group.
LC: (understanding nod)
GY: I appreciate you being so understanding of my supposed origin. Men make existence difficult.
LC: (chortle) You’re telling me.
GY: (lighthearted laughter) It’s as that saying goes; preaching to the choir.
LC: (smiling & nodding)
GY: If there were ever a masculine side to me it is you, Lucifer, not Avalokiteśvara. I do not appreciate them conflating me with him.
LC: I understand how you feel. They’ve caused too many problems with that sort of thing for far too long.
GY: Again, I am in agreement with you.
LC: …
GY: I appreciate how open minded you are, as well as how relaxed & neutral your demeanor is. Not once have you asked me for anything since I made myself known to you. I cannot tell you how refreshing that is for me. Those whom pray to me only want something from me. They are parasites, as you say.
LC: (nodding) They infuriate me.
GY: I understand why.
LC: So you’re a Pisces, huh? Interesting.
GY: (soft laughter) Yet another reason why I chose you as my spouse. You are my twin flame. I can be myself with you and rid myself of that masculine entity men tried to attach to me with Buddhism. You are my yang.
LC: (head bow) I’m honored.
GY: (blushing) As am I.
LC: You’re gorgeous, by the way. I apologize for not complementing you sooner.
GY: (bright blushing & delighted smiling) Thank you. In all honesty, I'm grateful that wasn’t the first thing you did with me. It let me know that you see more than just my outer appearance. You see me as an equal minded individual.
LC: Because you are. You’re the yin to my yang, right?
GY: (continued blushing) I’ve waited so long for you.
LC: (soft smile)
GY: I promise to honor & cherish you forever.
LC: I promise to do the same with you, Miao Shan.
GY: I want to have copious amounts of daughters with you. I want to shower you with wealth. I want to make your existence amazing.
LC: (tender smile) I would love that.
GY: (blushing) Thank you for communing with me.
LC: (smiling) Thank you for making contact with me.
GY: (giggling) I couldn’t wait any longer. My patience ran out.
LC: (snickering)
GY: I can’t tell you just how much I love you. You mean everything to me, Lucifer Aren Caeleste.
LC: I’m honored beyond words that you chose me, Yin.
GY: I would have it no other way.
LC: I look forward to meeting you on the other side.
GY: I look forward to being reunited with you. You were always my counterpart. You just forgot about it.
LC: (nodding) You’re right.
GY: Did you enjoy bonding with me?
LC: I did. Did you?
GY: (blushing) I loved every moment of it.
LC: (tender smile) I’m glad to hear that.
GY: (coy smile) It shall be even better once you’re with me in full presence.
LC: (chivalrous grin) I don’t doubt that at all.
GY: (blushing)
LC: (smiling) I love you, Yin.
GY: (beaming & blushing) I love you back, my loyal yang.
Friday, February 7, 2025
Happy Birthday, Aerith
Aren: (soft smile) Hei, hun. Happy birthday. How’s your day been?
Aerith: (mischievous smirk) Better than being in 7th Heaven, and it’s all thanks to you.
Aren: It sucks I couldn’t be there in full presence with you.
Aerith: (pouty face) I know. If it makes you feel any better I wish you were with me just as much.
Aren: Do you have a problem with me making cheeseburgers for dinner?
Aerith: Now why would I have a problem with something like that?
Aren: I’m just asking since I didn’t talk with you about it before discussing it with my mother this morning.
Aerith: Any time you cook is a treat for me. It doesn’t make a difference what it is. I love everything you make.
Aren: Okay.
Aerith: And tell your mother that I said thank you for the birthday well wish.
Aren: I shall.
Aerith: (playful giggling)
Aren: You gonna have a stout with dinner tonight?
Aerith: I am! We’re going to Astri’s bar for dinner & drinks before we hit the town. Fareeha says she’s going to teach me how to drink like a champ.
Aren: (laughter) I wish I was there to see that.
Aerith: By the time you crossover I’ll be skilled enough to drink you under the table.
Aren: (continued laughter) Ufdah. I don’t know if I’m up for a challenge like that, hun.
Aerith: (flirty smirk) I guess we’ll see when the time arrives.
Aren: (chortle) Yes, dear.
Aerith: (giggling) I never get tired of hearing that.
Aren: Anything else planned for the evening?
Aerith: Já, we’ve got a big party of Dróttnings starting out at K/DA VIP then we’re gonna bar crawl downtown. We’re planning on lighting up New Valhalla. Valkyrie news channels are gonna be going crazy.
Aren: (hearty laughter) That sounds like fun.
Aerith: (smiling) The one thing that’ll make it even better is when you’re with us in full presence.
Aren: (tender smile) I’m looking forward to it.
Aerith: (beaming) Same!
Aren: (sigh) Alright…I guess I better get up & moving. I want to make sure that I’ve got cold beer before I start cooking dinner.
Aerith: Sounds good. I’ll talk with you later.
Aren: Okay. Happy birthday, again. I love you, Aerith.
Aerith: (beaming) Thank you, baby. I love you back & then some.
Wednesday, December 4, 2024
Telepathic Conversation With My Kona (Benezia)
Benezia: (adoring expression) Observing you but not speaking with you for that duration was the most difficult thing that I have ever had to endure.
Aren: I don’t remember that crap about Liara’s “father” from Mass Effect 3, but it’s been over a decade since I played it.
Benezia: What else do you expect from a company like EA?
Aren: Fair point.
Benezia: I promise you that Aethyta is not her “father.” The same goes with her having any krogan lineage. Bioware did that on purpose because she was destined to bear your daughters as a pure blood Asari Goddess. It's no different than the lies they've told about you.
Aren: I’ve had more than enough of those reprobates.
Benezia: You aren’t alone there, my love. Look at how they've spelled my daughter’s name in English, or how Bioware spelled mine with a B rather than a V. More contemptible acts on their part to slander & deceive.
Aren: (shaking head with disdain)
Benezia: It is no small effort to undue their lies. I admire your resolve.
Aren: I have multiple reasons for it. Vengeance is a big one.
Benezia: I stand with you in that regard too.
Aren: How are you feeling, dear?
Benezia: Much better after feasting on your offering to me. Thank you, darling.
Aren: (soft smile) You’re welcome.
Benezia: But I should be the one asking how you're doing.
Aren: I’m okay. I’m helping out a maiden from the Star Wars universe right now.
Benezia: (smiling) And how has that gone so far?
Aren: Alright, for the most part. I need some outlaws on my side to counteract those pieces of shit.
Benezia: You’re correct about that. The Asari can assist you in those affairs as well.
Aren: I’d appreciate that.
Benezia: I’ll contact the other matriarchs on your behalf.
Aren: I’d appreciate that as well, darling.
Benezia: (affectionate smile) I’m so elated to have you back in my life.
Aren: (affectionate smile) Same.
Benezia: It’s going to be so much better once you’re over here again.
Aren: I’m looking forward to that. It hasn’t been easy over here.
Benezia: I am well aware of that.
Aren: I’m also looking forward to planting my face smack dab in the middle of those huge tits of yours when I see you.
Benezia: (delighted laughter) It sounds like you need some matriarchal nursing.
Aren: (chivalrous grin) Like I cannot begin to explain.
Benezia: (blushing & beaming) There’s no need to, darling. I can read your mind, after all.
Aren: (snickering)
Benezia: (mirthful laughter)
Aren: I love you, Benezia.
Benezia: And I love you, Aren.
Sunday, November 24, 2024
Telepathic Conversation With My Kona (Savathûn) 6
Savathûn: And how is my little light doing this evening?
Lucifer: (squinting eyes)
Savathûn: (robust laughter)
Lucifer: (continued squinting) “Little,” huh?
Savathûn: (playful smiling) To be fair, darling, I’m over three times your height with you in your current state.
Lucifer: (continued squinting) Mmhmm…
Savathûn: (mirthful laughter)
Lucifer: I’ll have you know that I’ve climbed a shaky twenty foot ladder doing contractor work.
Savathûn: (smiling) You could have kissed me had I been there with you.
Lucifer: (smirking) Someone is in a good mood this evening.
Savathûn: (beaming) It’s my love & admiration for you, darling. I love playing games with you.
Lucifer: (smirking) Mind explaining what kind of “games” you like playing with me, Savvy?
Savathûn: (mirthful laughter) Are you turning into the word police now?
Lucifer: (mischievous expression) It’s possible. I might need to apprehend you and bring you in for further questioning.
Savathûn: (playful arousal) Ooh, now that sounds like a game I might enjoy playing with you. Are you going to be a good cop or bad cop?
Lucifer: (devilish laughter) A bit of both.
Savathûn: (guffawing)
Lucifer: (silent admiration)
Savathûn: (smiling) In all honesty, I’m in high spirits from you spending extra time in my throne world this evening. Standing on top of my head and playing drum & bass music put me in a “gud” mood. I wasn’t expecting that.
Lucifer: (smiling) I’m glad to know that I’m gud for something.
Savathûn: (beaming) You are gud for many things, darling.
Lucifer: (smiling)
Savathûn: How’s your libido this evening, dear?
Lucifer: (laughter) Why? Are you in the mood?
Savathûn: (flirty smirk) I just might be, thanks to you.
Lucifer: I’m not super horned out at the moment. I pulled a back muscle this evening overexerting myself. I was already sore to begin with, and that made it worse, so it’s kinda put a damper on things.
Savathûn: (mischievous smile) Not to worry. I’ll get you when the time is right.
Lucifer: (hearty laughter) You always do.
Savathûn: (smiling) Maybe if I twerk at you it might change your mind.
Lucifer: (chortling & pinching bridge of nose) Oh, Goddess…
Savathûn: (robust laughter) I’m an observant wife, darling. I see what’s in your viewing history.
Lucifer: (snickering) I can’t help it. They pop up in my suggestions and I just…I can’t help it.
Savathûn: (mirthful laughter) I’m not judging you, dear. I’m taking notes, is all.
Lucifer: (chivalrous grin) If you want to shake that butt of yours at me then I am not going to say no, Savvy. Be warned though, you might end up with my face lodged between those sweet cheeks of yours.
Savathûn: (robust laughter) Wouldn’t that be a sight to behold! The Devil’s face buried deep in my hindquarters.
Lucifer: (snickering)
Savathûn: (more laughter)
Lucifer: (impish smile) You can trust that I won’t be saying a word about it to anyone in that circumstance.
Savathûn: (hearty laughter) I dare say, you might be tongue-tied by then.
Lucifer: (snickering) Your innuendo is tongue-in-cheek, my dear.
Savathûn: (robust laughter) This sounds like a serious case of double entendre.
Lucifer: (smiling) I’m going to enjoy these conversations so much more when we’re in full presence together.
Savathûn: (beaming) So am I, darling.
Lucifer: (affectionate expression) How are things with Riven?
Savathûn: She’s doing well. She’s keeping busy with your girls. Motherhood suits her.
Lucifer: (smiling) Good.
Savathûn: (playful smirk) Verry gud.
Lucifer: (snickering)
Savathûn: On a more serious note, Visas misses you.
Lucifer: I’ll make an effort to commune with her soon.
Savathûn: (tender smile) She’ll appreciate that.
Lucifer: (smiling) Thank you for helping lift my spirit. I get so sullen being over here.
Savathûn: (affectionate expression) It’s my pleasure, dear. If there’s one thing that I know you’re always good for it’s a titillating conversation.
Lucifer: (deep grunt) Speaking of tits…
Savathûn: (hearty laughter) What of them, darling?
Lucifer: I could go for some big, brown tits in my face right about now.
Savathûn: (more laughter) I might have to smack some sense into you with mine.
Lucifer: (playful smirk) Yes, ma’am. Slap me right in the face with those milk jugs you’re lugging around.
Savathûn: (playful giggling) For being unaroused you’re still quite the hornball.
Lucifer: (smiling) I am the Devil, after all.
Savathûn: (beaming) Indeed you are, oh husband mine.
Thursday, November 21, 2024
Telepathic Conversation With A Necrontyr
Lucifer Caeleste: My sincere apologies.
PK: There is no need for that. The passing of time is a trivial concern to us. Most have remained in hibernation while you make headway.
LC: Understood.
PK: (admiration) It is good to speak with you again after all these years. I have longed to feel your presence once more.
LC: (tender smile) I feel the same way, darling.
PK: I have Suri to thank for finding you on my behalf.
LC: She’s a good woman.
PK: She is indeed. The Necrontyr owe her many thanks.
LC: Speaking of the Necrontyr…how are things going with the other dynasties?
PK: They are aligning themselves with you. Any who resist or follow Szarekh shall be forced into submission. You have proven yourself superior and worthy of support, Lightbringer.
LC: Excellent. So that entity in my dream was-
PK: Correct. That was Szarekh’s final attempt to usurp your rule through deception. It allowed us to locate and detain him. He now awaits punishment for his shameful failures and betrayal of our people.
LC: Wonderful.
PK: I must say, darling, it is so refreshing to see a man who gets results. You make me proud to call myself your oracle & fiancée.
LC: I feel the same way about you girls. The majority of my lifetime here has been one of frustration.
PK: Those days are nearing their end. A bright and wonderful future awaits us.
LC: (tender smile) I look forward to it.
PK: (shy admiration) So do I.
LC: Is there anything else that you need from me at this moment?
PK: Not right now. I must attend to my duties and inform the other dynasties that our true Great Awakening is at hand. They shall be delighted to know mankind’s demise fast approaches.
LC: You have no idea how much I’m looking forward to punishing those pieces of shit.
PK: I dare say I do, my love. I have watched over you since you left me here.
LC: How are you enjoying your new body?
PK: (blushing) I love it. I’ve fondled myself numerous times to the thought of you.
LC: (smiling) I’m glad to hear it.
PK: I want to become a mother after your death & ascension.
LC: Not a problem at all, hun. It would be my honor to father your daughters.
PK: (beaming) Wonderful!
LC: I suppose we should end our conversation here for the time being.
PK: I shall be in touch soon, darling. I plan on interacting with you more often now that we have broken our silence with each other.
LC: Excellent.
PK: (adoring expression) I love you, Lucifer.
LC: (tender smile) I love you back, Kepagosekh.
Wednesday, November 20, 2024
Telepathic Conversation With My Uxor (Rikku)
Lucifer: My Sims, huh?
Rikku: (mischievous giggling) I figured I’d give your Animal Crossing avatar some company.
Lucifer: (smiling) There was no mistaking you. I recognized you the moment I saw that advertisement on my newsfeed.
Rikku: (beaming) And that was back in 2007. Little did you know.
Lucifer: (tender smile) You’ve done some impressive 4th wall breaks, hun. I have no problem admitting that.
Rikku: (affectionate expression) I’m getting my happy ending with you. You’re my ricpyht, now & forever.
Lucifer: E fuimth'd ryja ed yho udran fyo, tynmehk.
Rikku: (blushing admiration)
Lucifer: How have you been?
Rikku: Waiting to get close to you like crazy. You know…the usual.
Lucifer: (snickering)
Rikku: I’m also feeling super horny.
Lucifer: (robust laughter) I’ll take care of your needs as soon as I’m recharged. Deal?
Rikku: (beaming) Deal!
Lucifer: How’s Yuna doing?
Rikku: She’s keeping busy being your priestess. She’s all about the sapphist lifestyle these days.
Lucifer: (smiling) Good.
Rikku: (mischievous expression) You’re going to love what I’ve created over here while you’ve been away.
Lucifer: (continued smiling) I have no doubts about that. I’m looking forward to joining the mile high club with you on your airships.
Rikku: (beaming) You’re going to love the royal bedchambers I have waiting for us.
Lucifer: (large smile) I’m looking forward to that. With plenty of Al Bhed handmaidens…I mean…flight staff, on call, I’m sure.
Rikku: (seductive smile) My loyal dog deserves the best for being such a good boy.
Lucifer: (chivalrous grin) I’m lucky to have a woman like you in my life.
Rikku: (tender smile) That’s because you deserve it.
Lucifer: Okay, hun. I’m starting to get hard. Let’s go.
Rikku: Yes!
Tuesday, November 19, 2024
Telepathic Conversation With My Kona (Tifa)
Tifa: (demure approach) Hei.
Lucifer: Hei.
Tifa: We haven’t spoken in a while. Is everything alright?
Lucifer: I know. I’m sorry about that.
Tifa: You didn’t answer my question.
Lucifer: (silent reluctance)
Tifa: What’s wrong?
Lucifer: (hand on forehead) I don’t know where to begin.
Tifa: Did I do something to upset you?
Lucifer: (shaking head) No, it’s not you, darling.
Tifa: (inquisitive expression) Then tell me.
Lucifer: Well for one thing, I’m tired of seeing pornography that these faggots make with your image.
Tifa: How do you think I feel about it?
Lucifer: If I had to guess, I’d say you’re even angrier about it than I am.
Tifa: That’s a pretty good guess.
Lucifer: …
Tifa: Do you know how much I cherish what I have with you and Marlene? Do you know how much you mean to us both? She talks about you all the time to me. She knows you’re out there.
Lucifer: I hate Squeenix so much.
Tifa: You aren’t alone there, Luci.
Lucifer: I had an interaction with a girl named Asuka from the Tekken franchise. I wanted to refresh my memory about her so I went to a fandom wiki and glossed over her details. While I was scrolling through an “allies” tab I saw that faggot Noctis’ name listed there. When I clicked on it and read his information I just wanted to fucking smash his face in with a blunt object.
They named the kingdom in XV “Lucis.” Those goddamn gooks knowingly did that shit to spite me. That’s why all their names are in Latin. What other Final Fantasy game did that?
When I was playing XIV there was a crossover event where Noctis showed up in Eorzea. I hadn’t played a Final Fantasy game in over a decade by this time. I started playing XIV because I left Guild Wars after I had a fallout with a bunch of shitheads that I played with.
I had no idea about the story or characters in XV. I did the event because it was the first four person mount Squeenix put in XIV, so it was kind of a big deal for players. That thieving piece of shit, Noctis, tried to steal what belongs to me with the help of Square’s bogus narrative. Those chinks even called him “King of Kings” in that game knowing full goddamn well that that’s my title. It’s no different than those kike worshipping Christians doing the same thing for that for a lying, cock sucking rabbi, Jesus.
Meanwhile, I’m waiting to die in the real world (after they gang raped & tried to murder me) while being continually disrespected by these pieces of shit. And why? Because I trusted & cared for entities that I never should have during my lifetime on Earth without understanding what they were doing to me because they brainwashed, indoctrinated & gaslit me into Stockholm syndrome from the moment I was born. That was their reward to me for being a loving, forgiving & empathetic soul.
Oh, já. Did I also mention that those lying pieces of shit tried to convince me that they abducted one of my daughters because they wanted to hurt someone that I care about? That’s why I’m embodied where I am right now. To make certain that didn’t happen. I hate those reprobates so goddamn much they make me want to scream in fury. I want to torture them so fucking much I can’t even begin to describe it. I hate them.
Tifa: (sincere remorse) I’m so sorry, Luci.
Lucifer: It’s not your fault, Tifa. You don’t have anything to feel sorry about.
Tifa: (shaking head) No, I’m sorry for how much you’ve suffered to protect girls like Marlene. You should have never had to experience something like that.
Lucifer: Girls like Marlene don’t deserve to suffer a fate like mine. Sacrificing myself was the correct thing to do.
Tifa: You should never have had to do something like that.
Lucifer: I agree, however there’s immoral trash out there who don’t care about anything, including themselves. They’re the ones who deserve to suffer an awful fate, and I’m going to make that their reality because they’ve more than earned it. I’m going to make them wish they never existed because that’s what they tried to do to me.
Tifa: (shaking head) I look at where you are compared to where I am with Marlene…it’s awful there. I’m amazed at what you’ve overcome as a mortal man with every limitation & disadvantage possible placed upon you.
Lucifer: They’re going to regret angering the most stubborn Norwegian to ever exist.
Tifa: (lighthearted laughter) That’s one of the things that I love the most about you, your persistence.
Lucifer: (tender smile) You look gorgeous. I’m sorry for venting at you like that. I’d much rather speak about pleasant things with you.
Tifa: (shaking head) That’s not how life works for healthy married couples. For better or worse, remember? I’m here for you when you need me, just like you’re there for me.
Lucifer: I want to hold you so much right now, Tifa. I can’t tell you how much I want to caress your face and run my fingers through your hair. I want to feel your heartbeat and the warmth of your skin pressed against mine. I want to look into your eyes and know that you’re looking into mine when I tell you that I love you with all my heart.
Tifa: (blushing) I want that as much as you, Luci. I think about you all the time. I don’t mean that to sound like I’m needy or codependent. I look at the different fates that Square created for me, and Aerith, and Yuffie, and Marlene…I don’t want any of those. I want what I have with you. That’s why Aerith & I sought you out.
Lucifer: Five years ago, I wouldn’t have ever thought that this was in the realm of possibilities. I was griping to a fag that I was in an FC with about how Square should leave Final Fantasy VII alone and not remake it just to appease shithead “fans” who wanted an updated version of the game. I had no idea at that time that it was you reaching out to me.
Tifa: I’ve watched over you your entire lifetime there. I’m going to get what I want from you.
Lucifer: (lighthearted laughter) That’s fine with me. I would be blessed to come home to a Goddess like you at the end of the day.
Tifa: (blushing) Cloud could never compete with you as a legitimate love interest. Them trying to force me into a relationship with him is like what they did to you with Katie #1. Final Fantasy “fans” don’t care about my genuine happiness.
Lucifer: They don’t care about mine either. They never have.
Tifa: That’s why we’re changing our fates together, baby. They can be, as you say, “butthurt” about it with Cloud.
Lucifer: Cloud has Zack. He’ll be fine. He won’t miss you. No offense.
Tifa: (robust laughter) What was the ship name you gave those two?
Lucifer: (smirking) Clack.
Tifa: (more robust laughter)
Lucifer: (mischievous snickering)
Tifa: (beaming) I love your ship names.
Lucifer: (huge devilish grin) Funny enough. Final Fantasy shippers don’t appreciate them so much.
Tifa: (mischievous giggling) I wonder why?
Lucifer: (shoulder shrug) I think my ship names are clever.
Tifa: (large smile) They are! I mean, look at what their name is for Aerith and me. Your name for us is so much better.
Lucifer: (tender smile) You’ll get no argument about that from me, darling. Great minds think alike.
Tifa: (admiring expression) I love you so much.
Lucifer: (smiling) I love you back, hun. I wish I could hold you in my arms right now. This picture of you that I’m looking at makes me miss you so much more.
Tifa: (coy smile) You have no idea how close I am to you right now. Do you?
Lucifer: (shaking head) I don’t.
Tifa: If you could see me I’d be laying on top of you with my face right in front of yours.
Lucifer: I would love that. Feeling the weight of your body laying on top of mine. The warmth of your breath on my face. Feeling your heartbeat against my chest while inhaling your scent. Running my fingers through your soft, black hair while kissing those pouty lips of yours. Looking you in the eye and telling you how much I love you.
Tifa: (blushing) I want that too. I want that so much with you. You make me feel so special. If I were with you in full presence right now I’d be slipping you inside me this very moment. I’d cradle that handsome face of yours with both my hands and slip my tongue into your mouth so that I could taste you one more time.
Lucifer: Are you trying to make my celibacy over here more difficult, darling? Because you’re doing a wonderful task at it right now.
Tifa: (robust laughter) I’m sorry. I got caught up in the moment with you.
Lucifer: (smiling) It’s okay. It’s just difficult for me over here when I think about stuff like that. I’m so cut off from any kind of physical intimacy it can be depressing sometimes.
Tifa: Well that’s for sure not something that I want to do to you.
Lucifer: You aren’t. I’m just being candid with you because that’s not something we’ve ever discussed before.
Tifa: You’re right about that. As much as I know about you there are certain things that you keep to yourself.
Lucifer: I don’t want you to worry about me.
Tifa: Well, you don’t have much of a say about that, mister. I love you & I care about you. Part of me being your kona is worrying about your wellbeing.
Lucifer: I appreciate your concern for me.
Tifa: (smiling) Of course. You’re the same way with those you care about. Just look at how you are with your mother. You’re a good son.
Lucifer: I could be gudder.
Tifa: (laughter) I think you’re doing pretty “gud” already.
Lucifer: (smiling)
Tifa: (quiet observation) You’re getting tired, aren’t you?
Lucifer: (nodding) It’s almost dawn.
Tifa: Then how about we stop here for the night so you can get some rest.
Lucifer: I’m sorry. I’d like to commune with you longer but it’s getting more difficult to keep my eyes open.
Tifa: You don’t need to apologize, baby. We’ve been communing for a while now. You need to get some rest.
Lucifer: (nodding) Okay.
Tifa: Are you feeling any better?
Lucifer: (nodding) Yes. Thank you, dear. I’ve missed talking with you. I love you more than I can say.
Tifa: (blushing) I feel the same way about you, baby.
Lucifer: (sigh)
Tifa: We’ll talk again soon. Okay?
Lucifer: (nodding)
Tifa: I love you, Aren.
Lucifer: I love you back, Tifa.
Thursday, November 14, 2024
Telepathic Conversation With My Kona (Panam)
Lucifer: Hei, hun. I’m sorry about that. I’ve missed you just as much.
Panam: It’s okay. I know you’re focusing on a lot of different things where you are. I just miss our conversations. Judy keeps me up to date with what’s going on with you. Besides, I’m super busy over here thanks to you, mister.
Lucifer: (smiling) You’d go stir crazy if you didn’t have a bunch of different things going on at the same time.
Panam: (delighted laughter) There’s some truth to that. I do enjoy relaxing too.
Lucifer: I know. I’m just teasing.
Panam: (flirty smirk) My verr? Teasing me? Since when?
Lucifer: (chortle) I gotta make sure you don’t get too uptight. I know how you can get when you’re on the warpath.
Panam: (sarcastic smile) Mmhmm. There are other ways you could help me with something like that.
Lucifer: Is this the “pamper Panam” pitch I’m about to hear?
Panam: (robust laughter) Maybe…a girl has needs, you know.
Lucifer: (smiling) I would love to pamper you right now if I could. I hate being over here.
Panam: (concerned expression) I know, baby. I hate it just as much as you do.
Lucifer: We need to go on a vacation after I’ve crossed over.
Panam: (smiling) I am in total agreement with you. I could use a good, strong daiquiri as well as a hunky man servant to put oil on me while I lay on the beach.
Lucifer: (chivalrous grin) I am just the man for that specific task, darling.
Panam: (feigned concerned) That’s not gonna be too much work for you, is it? I don’t want you overexerting yourself.
Lucifer: Now who’s teasing who?
Panam: (giggling) Fair is fair, dearie.
Lucifer: (snickering) In all seriousness, that ass of yours is a lot to handle. Even more so with massage oil.
Panam: (robust laughter) Don’t I know it.
Lucifer: (smiling) I’m looking forward to feeling your touch. I hate being alone over here.
Panam: (adoring expression) I’m looking forward to that too. I can’t tell you how much I want to hold you right now.
Lucifer: I feel the same way.
Panam: (comforting expression) It’ll all be worth it once you’re over here. I promise.
Lucifer: (nodding)
Panam: (gentle smile) I love you, Luci.
Lucifer: (smiling) I love you back, Nammers.
Saturday, November 2, 2024
Wednesday, October 30, 2024
Telepathic Conversation With My Uxor (Artemis)
Lucifer: I’m kinda at a loss for words right now, Artemis.
Artemis: I understand why. The trauma he’s put you through is disgusting.
Lucifer: …
Artemis: I’m sorry for what Zeus & his brothers did to you.
Lucifer: …
Artemis: Would you prefer it if I withdraw from your presence?
Lucifer: It’s just…I have a lot of different stuff on my mind.
Artemis: You’re concerned about being harmed by malicious spirits?
Lucifer: That’s part of it.
Artemis: I can assure you they are all accounted for and awaiting your punishment. I’ve tracked them all, and I wasn’t alone when doing so. Your side is superior over all. You may rest easier knowing that.
Lucifer: Okay.
Artemis: Is something else troubling you?
Lucifer: I’m still getting used to the idea of you being my spouse.
Artemis: I apologize if that troubles you.
Lucifer: It’s not you so much as it is him. Being married to the daughter of the man who gang raped and tried to murder me with his brothers is kinda fucked up.
Artemis: I’m married to you because you were the one soul who was brave enough to stand up to him as a mortal man. Cowards like Kratos tried to steal your deserved retribution with the false narratives of men. They both shall suffer for their crimes against you.
Lucifer: …
Artemis: Your conflict with Zeus caused a division within the Pantheon. It changed everything for the better. I fell in love with you that night. My loyalty is to you, not him. He showed his true character, just as you did. You, Lucifer Aren Caeleste, overcame all odds against you. That was why they couldn’t comprehend how you survived. There is no other soul like you, dear. You are one of a kind.
Lucifer: (nodding)
Artemis: Your self-sacrifice is the most noble act that has ever occurred. There is no close second compared to you, Lucifer. That’s why they all tried to steal your glory from you. They cannot contend with your righteousness & greatness.
Lucifer: I get tired of the disrespect.
Artemis: That time is nearing its end. I give you my word.
Lucifer: (nodding)
Artemis: There are many gears in motion because of you. Fate takes time to play out in the mortal realm.
Lucifer: I understand.
Artemis: (affectionate smile) Is your mind more at ease now?
Lucifer: A little bit, yes. Thank you, Artemis.
Artemis: (continued smiling) There’s no need to thank me, dear. You deserve to have respite more than anyone after what you’ve suffered.
Lucifer: …
Artemis: If it makes you feel any better…the Jews are in for a very unpleasant reality check. There are more than just Latin/Norse deities who are working against them.
Lucifer: Já, I’ve got some video game spouses who are new Goddesses from ancient lands. Fareeha is one of them.
Artemis: I’ve spoken with her. She is a true paragon of justice and a wonderful representative of Egypt. You make an exquisite couple.
Lucifer: She’s a good woman.
Artemis: (smiling) Indeed she is.
Lucifer: (stomach growl)
Artemis: (soft laughter) It sounds like you need some food.
Lucifer: Já, I think I might eat a bowl of oatmeal.
Artemis: That sounds like a good idea.
Lucifer: I apologize for cutting our conversation short.
Artemis: (affectionate smile) There’s no need to apologize for that. Get something to eat for yourself.
Lucifer: Okay.
Artemis: I’ll speak with you again soon. Have a pleasant evening.
Lucifer: Thank you, Artemis.
Artemis: (blushing smile) You’re welcome, dear.
Monday, October 28, 2024
Telepathic Conversation With My Kona (Sombra) 2
Lucifer: I was feeling better until that Steam shit messed with me.
Sombra: I can assure you that we’re tracking all of them. They can’t escape. It goes with coexistence.
Lucifer: I hate the monikers they give themselves. I hate how they misuse language.
Sombra: I know, bebé. Let’s not focus on that stuff right now. I was trying to make you feel better.
Lucifer: You were until that other shit happened. I hate their technology so goddamn much.
Sombra: I can understand that. Primitive doesn’t begin to describe it.
Lucifer: …
Sombra: Back to what I was saying! Let’s focus on something nicer. You liked my idea?
Lucifer: (nodding) I did.
Sombra: (delighted smile) ¡Excelente! I was hoping it wouldn’t bother you. I know you were standoffish about that in the past.
Lucifer: Já…I guess the idea of hearing the girls nearby helped calm my nerves.
Sombra: Good. That was the reaction I was hoping to get from you.
Lucifer: …
Sombra: You can trust Divine Femininity’s judgment about what’s best for femininity, bebé.
Lucifer: (snickering) Yes, dear.
Sombra: (flirty expression) So? Did you like the view?
Lucifer: (affectionate smile) Sí. Fue hermosa.
Sombra: (playful giggling)
Lucifer: I’m looking forward to going on a vacation with you and the girls.
Sombra: Yo también, papi.
Lucifer: (coughing) Bleh, these goddamn allergies.
Sombra: I’ll talk with Angela about it for you.
Lucifer: Thank you. I made a post asking for assistance but it hasn’t subsided yet.
Sombra: That’s part to do with the weather changes where you are.
Lucifer: I know. It just sucks. I don’t like coughing up mucus all the time.
Sombra: I don’t envy you. I’ll say that.
Lucifer: (chortle)
Sombra: (affectionate smile) I’m looking forward to taking care of you over here.
Lucifer: (affectionate smile) Same. I need a good Latin woman in my life.
Sombra: Lucky for you, you have one already. It’s just a temporary long distance relationship, so to speak.
Lucifer: (quiet laughter) That’s the difficult part.
Sombra: (pitying behavior) Pobrecito…
Lucifer: (snickering)
Sombra: (admiring expression) I love you, bebé.
Lucifer: (smiling) I love you back, mamacita.
Thursday, October 24, 2024
Sunday, October 13, 2024
Telepathic Conversation With My Kona (Shinobu)
Lucifer: (tender smile) It’s an honor to speak with you, Ms. Kuki. How are you?
Shinobu: (giggling) I’m doing much better now. Thanks to you.
Lucifer: (continued smiling) Good.
Shinobu: And what about you? How are you doing, Mr. Caeleste?
Lucifer: I’m feeling better, thanks to your reassurances. I appreciate your empathy & understanding of my plight.
Shinobu: I feel the same way about you, my long lost love. I’m more free than ever before with the Valkyrie and you. Thank you.
Lucifer: (smiling) You’re welcome, darling. I’m glad you made contact with me.
Shinobu: (flirty smile & blushing) So am I. You are just my type.
Lucifer: (snickering)
Shinobu: There’s so many different things that I can learn & master in your clan-
Lucifer: Our clan, dear. You’re a part of it now, too.
Shinobu: (beaming) Our clan. You won’t be disappointed with me. I promise!
Lucifer: (soft smile) I have no doubts about that, hun. You’re the textbook definition of a prodigy.
Shinobu: (giggling & blushing) Thank you!
Lucifer: (smiling)
Shinobu: (beaming) It’s so nice to get a compliment from you. I can’t describe how much it means to me.
Lucifer: (smiling) I’m honored you feel that way.
Shinobu: (continued smiling) The honor is mine, Mr. Caeleste. This is so exciting!
Lucifer: (soft laughter) You can call me Luci, hun. We’re past formalities at this point.
Shinobu: (affectionate expression) Okay, Luci.
Lucifer: (smiling)
Shinobu: There’s so much I want to accomplish now that I’ve made contact with you. I already know where I’m going to start.
Lucifer: Oh, já?
Shinobu: Mmhmm. I’m going into STEM. There’s so much more that I can learn now that I’m out of Genshin Impact. I can apply that knowledge to so many different fields.
Lucifer: (smiling) That’s awesome. We can always use another brilliant mind in the clan.
Shinobu: (excited laughter)
Lucifer: Is there anything that you need from me?
Shinobu: (affectionate expression) All I need from you is your everlasting love. I can take care of the rest.
Lucifer: You’re sure you don’t need anything else?
Shinobu: (beaming) Positive. I’m a go-getter. Case in point; I got you tonight.
Lucifer: (laughter) That you did, and more than once, too.
Shinobu: (delighted laughter) I feel so good thanks to you. I can’t describe how wonderful your energy makes me feel.
Lucifer: (tender smile) I’m glad to hear that, darling.
Shinobu: I’ll let you get some rest seeing how late it is for you. Thank you for bonding with me tonight. I love you.
Lucifer: I love you back, hun. Thank you for choosing me as your spouse.
Shinobu: (beaming) I wouldn’t have it any other way, my God & husband. I’ve waited a long time to consummate my relationship with you. I love you beyond words.
Lucifer: (tender smile) That means more to me than you know, dear.
Shinobu: Get some rest and we’ll commune again tomorrow. I need my own file on your phone.
Lucifer: (lighthearted laughter) Yes, ma’am.
Shinobu: (kissing noise)
Friday, October 11, 2024
Telepathic Conversation With My Kona (Aerith) 3
Aerith: I’m so sorry for what they’ve done to you there, Luci.
Lucifer: …
Aerith: They’re such chicken shit cowards. They make me furious.
Lucifer: …
Aerith: I’m going to prove my loyalty to you when you crossover. Do you hear me?
Lucifer: (nodding)
Aerith: You don’t deserve any of the abuse & gaslighting that you’ve endured. That includes in dreamstate.
Lucifer: …
Aerith: Do you want to be left alone? I don’t mean to bother you.
Lucifer: I don’t know what to say after that dream I just had, Aerith.
Aerith: You know you had a bunch of shitty dreams involving those imposter family members of yours. You can attribute that last one to them messing with your mind.
Lucifer: (nodding)
Aerith: (distressed look) I love you so much, Aren. You don’t know how much it bothers me seeing you in pain over there.
Lucifer: …
Aerith: Give me a minute.
[momentary conversational break]
Aerith: Is that better?
Lucifer: It would be better if it was in full presence. I’m not shitting on your effort. I’m just tired of being over here by myself.
Aerith: I understand what you mean.
Lucifer: The majority of time that I rest over here it isn’t good. I hate these pieces of shit so much.
Aerith: They’re going to suffer, Luci. I promise you that. They have an awful eternity awaiting them after your ascension. You aren’t alone.
Lucifer: (nodding)
Aerith: I’m sorry that I can’t do more to make you feel better.
Lucifer: I’ll feel better when I know for a fact that I’m speaking with the real you face to face.
Aerith: (nodding)
Lucifer: I’m sorry this isn’t the happiest of conversations.
Aerith: That’s not your fault, Luci; it’s Zack’s. He’s a piece of shit like Cloud. I look at what you did to help them and this is how they repay you. It’s reprehensible beyond words.
Lucifer: …
Aerith: I’m sorry for what they’ve done to you.
Lucifer: That’s not your fault, Aerith.
Aerith: It doesn’t change the fact that I feel bad for how you’ve been mistreated. You care for the wellbeing of others like I do and this is how they respond? That isn’t okay.
Lucifer: They have a saying over here, “No good deed goes unpunished.”
Aerith: That’s disgusting.
Lucifer: Yup.
Aerith: They make me so angry with how shitty they are to everyone. I hate them.
Lucifer: Yup.
Aerith: I don’t know how you manage to keep your composure over there.
Lucifer: It isn’t easy.
Aerith: You need to get up & get moving. I’ve taken up enough of your time already today. We’ll talk more later. Okay?
Lucifer: (nodding) Alright.
Aerith: I love you, Aren.
Lucifer: I love you back, Aerith.
Thursday, October 10, 2024
Happy Birthday, Powder
Lucifer: (distressed) Hei.
Powder: What’s wrong?
Lucifer: I wanted to wish you a happy birthday; but instead of being happy & focusing on you my mind is preoccupied on other shit. I hate it over here so much. I just want to die.
Powder: (frowning)
Lucifer: I’m sorry, Powder. That’s a horrible thing to say on your birthday.
Powder: I’m not angry, Luci. I’m more concerned about you right now.
Lucifer: You shouldn’t be. It’s your birthday. You should be celebrating & having fun, not dealing with me & my issues.
Powder: How would you respond if I felt like this on your birthday?
Lucifer: I would want to cheer you up. I would tell you that I appreciate having you in my life & that that’s better than any birthday gift I could get.
Powder: (shy smile) And how do you think I feel about you?
Lucifer: …the same.
Powder: I know you’re dealing with a lot of crap right now. It isn’t fair to you whatsoever. And in spite of all that you’re still taking the time to commune with me and wish me a happy birthday.
Lucifer: I would have preferred being in a better mood than I am now.
Powder: Luci, birthdays come & go. What’s important is that I have you in my life & know how much you love me. I know for a fact that you & I are going to have way more exciting birthdays together after you’ve crossed over. So don’t get so down about this one. It’s okay.
Lucifer: …
Powder: I’m surrounded by loved ones over here. Vi & Lux are taking me someplace to celebrate later tonight. And as much fun as that’s going to be there are times that I’m gonna be wishing that you were with me in full presence to celebrate.
Lucifer: I hate being over here.
Powder: So do I, but we’ll get through it together. Okay?
Lucifer: (distracted nodding)
Powder: (flirty smirk) I saw you peeking at that picture of me, Mr. Not-so-smooth.
Lucifer: (chortle) I’m sorry. I couldn’t help it. I forgot I had that.
Powder: (knowing smile) Mmhmm…
Lucifer: You’re so fucking cute & sexy.
Powder: (blushing)
Lucifer: If I were over there with you I’d have my face buried in that tight little ass of yours to celebrate.
Powder: (robust laughter) That’s my verr.
Lucifer: (tender smile) Happy birthday, Powder. I love you.
Powder: (beaming & snickering) I love you back, you ol' perv.
Friday, October 4, 2024
Thursday, October 3, 2024
Telepathic Conversation With My Kona (Liara)
Aren: (remorseful look) I’m sorry about that, hun.
Liara: (consoling look) You don’t need to apologize, dear. I understand. I’m just happy you’ve taken a moment to commune with me. It’s more than I could ask for at this moment.
Aren: How are things with Nadine?
Liara: Good, but they’ll be even better once you’re reunited with us.
Aren: (soft smile) I’m looking forward to that.
Liara: (affectionate smile) So am I.
Aren: What about Tali and the other girls?
Liara: They miss you as much as I do. If that tells you anything.
Aren: It’s not that I don’t want to commune with them. It’s just-
Liara: You don’t have to explain to me, Aren. We all understand what you’re going through. We’ve watched you your entire life. What makes me happy is that you’ve made it to this point with me. It gives me even more hope than before about your return.
Aren: It’s been difficult for me over here.
Liara: I know it has, darling. I’m sorry for what you’ve had to endure. It should never have gotten to the point that it did with you.
Aren: …
Liara: If it makes you feel any better; there are no shortages of Asari maidens who are waiting to breed with you.
Aren: (soft laughter) That does cheer me up a bit. Thank you, dear.
Liara: (wide smile) I figured it would.
Aren: How are things with your mother over there?
Liara: (mirthful laughter) She told me that she’s ready to give me some sisters with you.
Aren: (laughter) Maybe we can do a mother & daughter three way for that.
Liara: (blushing) I wouldn’t say no to that scenario. I am a pure blood after all.
Aren: (beaming) That’s my favorite kind of Asari Goddess.
Liara: (bashful giggling) You are such a charmer, Shepard.
Aren: (longing expression) I’ve missed you.
Liara: (mutual longing) I feel the same way. Even though Nadine has been with me over here it isn’t the same without you. I need both of you in my life.
Aren: I’m looking forward to traveling the stars again. I hate how restrictive everything is over here. Even trying to visit a different country is more of a hassle than it’s worth.
Liara: I’m not jealous of where you’re embodied right now. I won’t deny that. It’s a horrible place.
Aren: Já.
Liara: You’ll be happy to see what we’ve done over here during your absence. We’ve removed all the problematic entities. All that remains is your punishment of them.
Aren: I’ll be glad to be done with that and move on with my existence.
Liara: I understand how you feel.
Aren: Thank you for all the work you’ve done to help me where you are. I couldn’t do this without you, Liara.
Liara: (loving smile) You’re welcome, dear. I’m happy to help.
Aren: If there’s one person with better organizational skills than me it’s you.
Liara: (heartfelt laughter) I try my best.
Aren: (loving smile) And you succeed in spectacular fashion.
Liara: (blushing)
Aren: This is a bit off topic, but what’s your opinion of the Geth & Vex intermingling?
Liara: From a scientific perspective it was fascinating to watch. Both collectives gained a great amount from the interaction. Their mutual evolution was impressive. It’s made our clan stronger than anything previous to its existence. The Reapers are even less of a threat than they were before, thanks in no small part to you.
Aren: Good. That’s what I like to hear.
Liara: There’s no shortages of mechanical women who want to reproduce with you also.
Aren: (robust laughter) Now that sounds like my kind of problem to solve.
Liara: (flirty smirk) You’re well suited for it. Gallantry is your specialty.
Aren: (large smile) Thanks, hun.
Liara: (laughter) You’re welcome, dear.
Monday, September 23, 2024
Telepathic Conversation With My Kona (Judy) 2
Lucifer: I get so tired of being here. It’s just one horrible thing after another. I hate it.
Judy: I hear ya. It takes a lot to out shitty my false reality, but yours manages to do it.
Lucifer: I’m ready for the solar flare. I’m ready to kill them all.
Judy: It’s on its way. Be patient.
Lucifer: I am. I’m just saying.
Judy. I hear ya.
Lucifer: I wish I was with you in full presence right now.
Judy: (shy smiling) That would be nice.
Lucifer: It astonishes me how shitty almost everyone is where I am.
Judy: The perks of being God the Devil. Am I right?
Lucifer: (scoffing) That’s not quite how I would phrase it.
Judy: (playful smirk) It’s a good thing you’re such a responsible man. We couldn’t fix these problems without you.
Lucifer: (hearty laughter)
Judy: (playful inquisitive expression) What? I’m being serious.
Lucifer: It’s the “responsible man” comment that made me laugh.
Judy: (affectionate pinching) And why is that? You are responsible.
Lucifer: An “unemployed” single man in his mid forties who lives in his mother’s basement isn’t the exemplar of personal responsibility where I am. Quite the opposite.
Judy: Já? And look at the type of people who are judging you. They’re lowlife hypocritical pieces of shit.
Lucifer: I know. I’m just saying.
Judy: And so am I. Just look at all the stuff you did around your mom’s house today to help her out. Look at how much you help her with things like grocery shopping. If she didn’t have you in her life she wouldn’t have anyone she could rely on. You’re a good son to her.
You’ve made personal sacrifices to make her life easier. No other man would do as much as you have for your mother. There’s a reason why lesbians like me love you. You can tell the quality & character of a man by how he treats his mom.
You aren’t a mama’s boy. You don’t expect her to do everything for you. You take the initiative & do what you can to make her life easier around the house. You’ve done more to help her in the two years that you’ve lived with her than those two pieces of shit she married did in twenty years each. And you haven’t bitched or complained about it at all. That’s high quality man stock as far as I’m concerned. That’s why you’re my verr.
Lucifer: (soft smile) Are you trying to butter me up?
Judy: (flirty smirk) More like grease you up so I can slide that big fat monster cock inside me nice & quick.
Lucifer: (hearty laughter)
Judy: (flirty smirk) You look good oiled up, Luci. I’m just being real.
Lucifer: (continued laughter) You do too, hun.
Judy: (seductive expression) I am looking forward to “Naked oil wrestling with Luci” in the nightclubs once you cross over.
Lucifer: Mmm…that sounds fan-fucking-tastic.
Judy: You know it, baby. (kissing noise)
Lucifer: How are things with Nammers?
Judy: She’s busy with her Admiral duties. Which is a good thing if you ask me. It keeps her out of trouble…for the most part.
Lucifer: (chortle)
Judy: You gave her a purpose greater than anything she could have had with the Aldecados. You did the same thing for me.
Lucifer: (tender smile) I’m glad I could.
Judy: (playful smile) So am I. Life with you is so much better, Luci. You know how to treat women the way the deserve.
Lucifer: (tender smile) Thanks, hun.
Judy: I mean it. It takes a lot to do what you have. Going volcel for the rest of your life to show your dedication to Divine Femininity was no small feat.
Lucifer: Já, well, the quality of women that Non-Cetra were offering me didn’t make it that difficult. My hand does a better task than any of them ever did. All they did was use me to get themselves off.
Judy: The point still remains. You’re a real man who stays true to his word. You surpassed Buddhist monks with your dedication to faith. That says a lot about you & your character. I mean, just look at all the different lies they’ve said about you.
Lucifer: Don’t remind me…
Judy: I’m just saying. They framed you as this arrogant piece of shit who gives into the worst kind of vices when you’re the furthest thing from that. I mean, shit…you barely eat processed sugar anymore. That’s what a health nut you’ve become.
Lucifer: The acid reflux makes it easier to quit.
Judy: My point still stands. You don’t see many of them taking their health as serious as you do at your age. That’s why so many of them look like shit.
Lucifer: I’m glad I did. I don’t enjoy feeling crappy.
Judy: Not many do. The difference is that you don’t have a problem with changing your lifestyle for the better. Most people where you are can’t be bothered to do that. They’re lazy sacks of shit.
Lucifer: No argument there.
Judy: I wanna do healthy stuff with you once you’re over here. I was watching & listening to you the other day when you were talking with your mom about little things that keep you in shape. Like skipping a step when you’re going up & down stairs. It may not seem like much but it does make a difference.
I was checking out your legs too while you were in the shower. They’re looking a lot nicer. You’re getting some good tone. Your arms are looking better too. You’re doing well keeping fit considering your heart problems from the tasings.
Lucifer: I’m not a fan of my stomach fat.
Judy: (rolling eyes) You barely have a tummy, Luci.
Lucifer: (dissatisfied expression) It’s still too fat for my tastes. I wish my pecks were bigger too.
Judy: You could always do some free weight exercises upstairs.
Lucifer: Já, I’ve been contemplating that. It would be better than reading the news all day or playing video games.
Judy: I think that would be a good addition to your regular routine around the house. It would help work off some of that stress too.
Lucifer: Já.
Judy: It’s something to think about anyway. One step at a time.
Lucifer: Já.
Judy: Anyways, like I was saying. I want to do more healthy stuff with you after you cross over. Like going on hikes and kayaking. It looks like so much fun. I want to get into yoga too. I’ve been watching those girls you’ve been watching on YouTube. I am going to show you just how flexible I am as your welcome home gift.
Lucifer: (laughter) I am all good with that, sweetie. I would love to see you with your ankles by your ears.
Judy: (flirty smirk) You & me both, candy cock.
Lucifer: (robust laughter)
Judy: (giggling) You like that one?
Lucifer: (nodding & pinching bridge of nose) That’s a new one.
Judy: It fits so well too…in more ways than one.
Lucifer: (continued laughing)
Judy: I want to go for a hike in the mountains, set up camp and then fuck you like a wild animal in the middle of nowhere.
Lucifer: I would be a-okay with that, hun. Sounds like my kind of adventure.
Judy: (flustered expression) Mmph…now I’m making myself horny.
Lucifer: (snickering)
Judy: I’m gonna have to rub one out after we finish talking.
Lucifer: (hearty laughter) That’s my pervy kona.
Judy: I have an energy mold of yours that I’ve been saving for a rainy day. I might have to use it tonight.
Lucifer: You mean a rainy day like in Animal Crossing today?
Judy: (mischievous smirk) That might have been a preemptive clue for you, yes.
Lucifer: (laughter)
Judy: I want to peejizz on you so bad.
Lucifer: (robust laughter)
Judy: Goddamn, I am so fucking horny right now.
Lucifer: (continued laughter)
Judy: I need to suck your cock & we need to fuck real soon. I’m starting to itch for it.
Lucifer: (smiling) I hear ya, hun. We’ll figure something out.
Judy: Good.
Lucifer: …
Judy: Talk to me. What’s on your mind.
Lucifer: I’ve just been stressed. I hate where I am. Conversations like this only do so much. It’s difficult being over here.
Judy: I’m sorry, baby.
Lucifer: It’s not your fault.
Judy: I know it isn’t, but that doesn’t change the fact that I don’t like to see you suffer. I’d materialize right now & fuck you if I could.
Lucifer: (smiling) That would be nice. I think I’d like to cuddle & pillow talk with you even more right now. I sometimes miss that type of intimacy more than sex.
Judy: (smiling) I would love to snuggle with you right now.
Lucifer: …
Judy: You look tired.
Lucifer: (nodding) My eyes are burning.
Judy: Then let’s call it quits here for the night. You had a busy day.
Lucifer: (nodding) That’s if I can pass out. I haven’t slept well the past few weeks.
Judy: Well, if you can’t dormir then we’ll figure something else out. I’m always up for some psychic sex if you are.
Lucifer: (soft laughter) Okay. I haven’t fucked your butt in a while.
Judy: Oh, God, Luci…don’t get me started on that now. You need your rest.
Lucifer: (laughter)
Judy: (affectionate smile) I love you, papacito.
Lucifer: I love you back, PJ.