Telepathic Conversation With My Kona (Petra) 2

Lucifer: You know…now that the Witness has been defeated by Bungie’s elites…that leaves heroes like Crow & Zavala with a lot more free time to explore new areas together…

Petra: (snickering)

Lucifer: Cayde’s out of the picture for sure. The Vanguard is gonna need a strong hunter who’s familiar with leading others. Uldren has those qualities as a prince & guardian.

He’s already taken the initiative with Ikora & Zavala, and is giving them scouting reports. He's a good replacement for Cayde. He has a diplomatic relationship with Mara that keeps the peace between the two factions. He’s basically the new hunter vanguard representative. It just isn’t official.

I mean…they were sitting together like a fireteam in that ending cinema with the lanterns for crying out loud. The forumites are already gushing about his manbun too. There’s so many positive vibes about all of this that it makes it difficult to ignore.

Petra: (shoulders shaking & hushed laughter)

Lucifer: After all he’s gone through…Zavala could use a break. Maybe what he needs is a nice gud beefy rubdown. Like…hot & sweaty grinding with another woke dude who understands his struggles. You know? Someone who knows how he feels deep inside.

Petra: (pinching nose & squinting eyes laughing)

Lucifer: What’s so funny, Petra? I’m being for realz with you right now.

Petra: (delighted giggling)

Lucifer: Crowvala’s love shall be known throughout the multiverse. I am going to make certain of that. I promise. It’s my duty as God the Matchmaker.

Petra: (reddened cheeks, large smile & giggling)

Lucifer: I love love.

Telepathic Conversation With My Kona (Petra)

 

Petra: I appreciate the intel. Thank you.

Lucifer: You’re welcome, dear. How are things on your end?

Petra: I’m looking forward to us fighting on the same side. I’ll say that.

Lucifer: I look forward to it too. I’m ready to punish & humiliate my enemies in a ‘loving’ way.

Petra: I’ve got some stories to share with you in private after you crossover. You’ll laugh.

Lucifer: (mischievous giggling) Am I-

Petra: Yes! (Profuse laughter)

Lucifer: I am looking forward to exposing Crowvala’s love to those forumite faggots.

Petra: (robust laughter)

Lucifer: It’s gonna be even better with you standing beside me. I can say with sincerity, “Petra can vouch for me.”

Petra: (more laughter)

Lucifer: I am going to have so much fun doing play by play commentary with Saladin. "Looks like we've got some hot & beefy mangina grindin' goin' on here, Sal."

Petra: (shoulders shaking & quiet giggling)

Lucifer: (wicked snickering)

Petra: I love you, Luci. I needed a gud laugh.

Lucifer: (delighted snickering)