Telepathic Conversation With My Kona (Petra) 2

Lucifer: You know…now that the Witness has been defeated by Bungie’s elites…that leaves heroes like Crow & Zavala with a lot more free time to explore new areas together…

Petra: (snickering)

Lucifer: Cayde’s out of the picture for sure. The Vanguard is gonna need a strong hunter who’s familiar with leading others. Uldren has those qualities as a prince & guardian.

He’s already taken the initiative with Ikora & Zavala, and is giving them scouting reports. He's a good replacement for Cayde. He has a diplomatic relationship with Mara that keeps the peace between the two factions. He’s basically the new hunter vanguard representative. It just isn’t official.

I mean…they were sitting together like a fireteam in that ending cinema with the lanterns for crying out loud. The forumites are already gushing about his manbun too. There’s so many positive vibes about all of this that it makes it difficult to ignore.

Petra: (shoulders shaking & hushed laughter)

Lucifer: After all he’s gone through…Zavala could use a break. Maybe what he needs is a nice gud beefy rubdown. Like…hot & sweaty grinding with another woke dude who understands his struggles. You know? Someone who knows how he feels deep inside.

Petra: (pinching nose & squinting eyes laughing)

Lucifer: What’s so funny, Petra? I’m being for realz with you right now.

Petra: (delighted giggling)

Lucifer: Crowvala’s love shall be known throughout the multiverse. I am going to make certain of that. I promise. It’s my duty as God the Matchmaker.

Petra: (reddened cheeks, large smile & giggling)

Lucifer: I love love.