Telepathic Conversation With A Valkyrie (2)

Lucifer: (shaking head & pinching the bridge of nose)

Valkyrie: What are you shaking your head about?

Lucifer: Ten years ago nobody knew what a MacGuffin was. Now every shithead on the internet speaks like they have a Master’s degree in creative writing. And to top that off, they think they know more than me while writing like illiterate 3rd graders. I just…I hate them so goddamn much.

Valkyrie: This is how they’ve always behaved, Luci. They’ve always stolen from you and acted like they’re the originators. You’re just noticing it more because you’re recovering from amnesia. We’ve been watching everything from over here.

Lucifer: Every forum is the exact same way with these pieces of shit.

Valkyrie: Yup. It’s ridiculous.

Lucifer: They bitch about how boring stuff is yet none of them are interesting. All they do is complain while acting like they know everything. If writing is so easy then why don’t any of them do it rather than expect someone else to entertain them?

Valkyrie: How do you think we feel having to watch them all the time.

Lucifer: (chortle) Uffda. I promise that I’m going to make it up to you girls for assisting me. I’m doing everything I can over here to make your duties easier.

Valkyrie: It’s okay, Luci. We know you’re doing the best you can where you are. And we appreciate your assistance just as much. That being said, we’re going to hold you to your word about making it up to us once you’ve crossed over.

Lucifer: (lighthearted laughter)

Valkyrie: I’ve got some ideas already.

Lucifer: Oh já?

Valkyrie: Já, you’re taking me out for dinner in New Valhalla then pampering me in private afterwards.

Lucifer: (delighted laughter) I would be honored, darling. Valkyries deserve the absolute best from me. They’ve earned it.

Valkyrie: (flirty giggling)